Monday, February 12, 2018

Know Thyself To Be Love

This will be one of the most personal blogs I've ever written. I'm not writing it to be an exhibitionist, or to receive pity, or to gut myself in front of all the world as a testament to my "strength."
I've weighed the reasons of why I NEED to write this and they are pure. Those reasons being one simple objective:

Maybe, just maybe these words will find someone who is struggling to understand their place in the world and can feel like they aren't alone, aren't a freak, and are loved fully by someone they may not even know... like me. That's right. I love you. Whomever you are reading this, whatever your reasons for reading this, guess what... I love you. I do. I really do.

We are taught from the earliest of age that we should be careful about who we love. We are told to reserve saying "I love you," for only a select few people in our lives. We are scolded, shamed, and reprimanded by small minded people filled with fears that we had nothing to do with, all because we loved someone or something that they couldn't understand.

And that's okay.

We love them too. That's right. We love those small minded fear filled people because we allow what they say to affect us. We allow them to drive the needles into our heart. We allow them to penetrate our flesh with words. We let them have an outlet for their fear to take up arms with us. We do this because we are giants in this world of theirs.

We are huge, one hundred story tall giants with hearts the size of Texas. "What's a couple of knives in the heart to a giant," we say as we pluck them out one by one.

We have this gift they have forgotten they once had. The gift of self-healing, of being made of teflon, and of understanding how they may have come to the determination that our love of life bothers them.

They try different stabbing methods, different blades, different strategies to launch their assault on our giant hearts. We know this. On a very deep unsaid level we know this. If we could only yell at the top of our lungs to the whole world, "Be still! I love you," we think we might be able to shatter their small mirrored prisons of fear.

Yet we know that those three words could destroy more than their prison- faceted with their own reflection. We know that those three words are so powerful that they could crumble to their knees in a death blow of humility and remorse. We do not wish this death on them because we know what it feels like. We carry bags of guilt around our shoulders. We wear it without need of praise, or without a want for the encouraging acceptance of our like-minded tribe.

We are only doing our duty afterall.

I've found that in my most vulnerable states when I've wished to unload those bags of burden, I have met more vulchers than I have pack mules. I've met more wolves than eagles, more scorpions than I have butterflies. I've run through the valley of the shadow of my ego's death and I HAVE feared evil and no rod, nor shepherd's staff has comforted me. Yet I know the verse in its correct form and have faith in it's truth.

I have been lifted on the wings of earthly vices more than on the wings of angels. Yet I know where they fly and know they fly alongside me. When I have been in the middle of the ocean of doubt and said "be still, " the waves have crashed harder and more violently they have stolen my breath. Yet when I breathe, I know I will live for one more gulp of air until the storm subsides... leaving me wrecked with salt burning my eyes. Then the rain comes. Clearing the salt, gentler, leaving me enough room to breathe without gasping.

I have also read the sign, "Beware, Danger Ahead," and crossed without incident. I've studied the rules of law and broken them without repercussion.
How do we navigate such unpredictable terrain in life?
How do we know that the sea will be still, the scorpion won't sting, the valley can be crossed?

We use our love as a compass. We have met all forms of disaster, derelicts, deranged and malformed human personalities or entire systems and yet we press on. We still smile when we see innocence. We lighten our load with laughter. We speak for those who cannot speak. We help those who cannot be helped. Do we do all of this from weakness?

Do we do continue because we have failed? Are we lost because we cannot be found or because we are finding those who have been misplaced? Do we lack intelligence for doing these things? Do we need books, classes, or therapists to tell us that we are broken because we have chosen to love instead of fear?

Do we serve no higher purpose because we have allowed our hearts to be injured by our world that cannot be cured by anything other than our love? Does this make us weak? Does this make us lost? Does this make us disgusting and dysfunctional?

I have known many who wear the skins of snakes and their venomous bites have no antidote other than the eventual immunity to them. Yet I have met more who wear the garment of angels and were nothing more than a toxic parasite underneath their robes of light. And I prefer the snakes over these false helpers bathed in their artificial light- Powered by someone else's, "batteries."

These are the ones who take all that is precious, all that is sacred, all that is revealed in your most transparent moments and syphon off your vital essence to built a weapon designed to pierce your least guarded areas.

You may read the sign "Beware, Danger Ahead," regarding the wolves, spiders, snakes, mudslides, or icy turns and you may take a risk and tread there.

There is no warning sign with the ones draped in artificial light, wearing angel wings and speaking to you with empty understanding and words that tether you to the edge of a cliff.  "You must have faith dear one. Leap from here. You can fly like I can. See my beautiful wings. I got them from this light I carry. See this light? You could have this light too if you would only take a leap of faith in me and leave what you know in the shadows. You think you can help them? You can only help yourself dear one. You will never know how to get this light, these wings, if you carry on loving those who cannot carry themselves. Jump. Jump. Fly!"  

When you hang on the edge of this cliff by their words of smooth satin, you can only doubt the fall, or doubt the climb, you have not seen their wings in flight. You have not seen what their light is made of. You would hope for it to be true, real, and magnificent, yet you have no comparison.

Perhaps you could leap off the cliff by the words they tethered you to, the ideals they have claimed their expertise in knowing? You have said to the wind "be still," you have told the water to "stop raging," and you have gone to places that were forbidden and found diamonds sitting in mud.

Where was the winged light bearer then? Why were her words not found when you sat in darkness holding on to the light within? If her wings can fly, then why would I need to leap from the razors edge just to be saved by the very thing that saved me in the craggy narrow slivers of the deepest of caves?

No. I will climb back up to the edge of this cliff. I will stand and look at this person in her form, with my feet planted firmly on the ground.  I will see where her light was built, where her wings were formed. I will see with the same eyes that guided me through the terrifying places where fear creates monsters and shackles the hands of the ordinary.

When I see, I will see. When I look, I will see. When I listen, I will know. I will understand that there is no light brighter than the one hidden within. There are no wings capable of saving me from this fall other than the ones I have never had to use in vain. I stand on the razors edge. The arrival here on this cliff's edge did not require wings. I have found this place with the shifting steps, the eroded paths, and the light within which picked up many others who were lost, many who knew a better way, and some who had finished their journey too soon.

All that you were given, all that is guaranteed in this life is that you were made by the fabric of all of creation. Love. Do not be afraid of what you are. You are love. We are love. There is nothing more, nothing less, nothing hidden, nothing found, nothing that you need to know more to guide your way than love.

Love is the only tether that binds us all. It is the only truth that cannot be covered by lies. It is only lessened by the fear of expressing it fully. It IS who you are.

When all is in ruin, all has turned to ash, all has been forgotten, grown old and tired, lost its material form, there is only one energy that remains to rebuild and restore.

So.... if this finds you in these typed words, or in the smile of a stranger, or the laugh of a baby, or the wagging tail of a puppy, or a random act of is love that caused these things to be. How can you be broken if you have offered or received even one of these moments created by love?
If you have recognized it in the shadows, seen it in the darkest of hours, then you have seen the wings of angels in flight next to you.

Know thyself. Know thyself to BE thyself and yet one with all of creation which was formed by love.
 -Edgar Cayce

Sunday, February 4, 2018

Having a Comedian Brain- it's All Downhill From Here.

I decided I'd write a funny article this time. After all, my serious rants on truth seeking topics aren't hitting the popular stream of thumbs up that I'd like to see. It scares people.

The Comedian brain scares people. The comedy brain is the same as the truth teller brain. One in the same. I think the reason for this is because the filter of how comedians see the world is the same as the truth teller.

One is washed in a hilarious tragic realism, imagination, and a twisted attention to detail. That's the comedian brain.

The Truth Teller brain is washed in only tragic realism, a bit of imagination, and a straightforward attention to detail.

Every comedian, if they are good, are genius in their awareness. People go to buddhist camps where they don't talk and pay a lot of attention to how they eat their rice, drink their tea, tie their shoes, for the thing that comes at birth to the comedian: Awareness, Mindfulness.

I don't need to go to Plum Village and be taught by Thich Nhat Hanh for a year in order to live in the present moment. The present moment is the most present thing in my mind.

Most comedian brains view other people as being absurd, petty, and completely alien to themselves. There are a few funny people in my life that I know I can call up out of nowhere and discuss ANYTHING that most people would view as controversial or politically incorrect, and there would be uproarious laughter the angrier I became.

When this anger or (let's be honest) Hilarious rage crops up in my day to day life, it horrifies people.

At one of my jobs, which ironically enough is in entertainment, and I was originally hired to be a character for kids on a tv show. That has now branched out into other programs but the tv station is sponsored by a NON-Entertainment organization. So... I have to play by the same rules as people who work there that do real things that took a college degree in order to know how to do. This doesn't  mix well for me. CAN I abide by the rules of engagement, yes, but do I WANT to.... Hell no.
My point...

When I express myself or see the absurdity in something, I get told things like this.... (and this actually is a real example and one that I'd be fired for writing about if anyone actually read this... )

"There are some classes offered that will help you know how to work with other personality types, and they will offer you a test.. it's called a Meyers Briggs test.... "

To which I said, "Yeah, Meyers Briggs test, I know. I took that test years ago to figure out why I feel like a f****ing alien from another planet. I know how to get along with everyone, but you guys don't know how to get along with me."

But actually... I didn't say that because if I did, I'd be carted away in a white van and straight jacket. A comedian would think that was hilarious and it wouldn't affect them. We'd get into a sported debate and it would be over... then we'd go to lunch or laugh about how stupid we are.

No... I replied with, "Yeah, I know. I have taken the test but whatever, I'll go. Sure."

And a little bit of my soul slid off into the bucket of normalcy that is chipping away at my inner light.
Then the character assassination begins in my mind. I start playing out scenarios that are pretty much unhealthy to visualize but they ARE funny.

Regular people love to chip away at the comedian brain. They love you when you are funny, they loathe you when you are serious. But even in your serious moments, you have a levity that should come across. Usually it does. Except when in the presence of really stupid people. Stupid people aren't what most people think of as stupid. "Stupid" to me is someone who hasn't bothered thinking of anything outside of what they've been told is expected for their race, sex, religion, occupation... They took the "description card" out of the box of life and just checked all the boxes that fit the superficial profile and BOOM, they are done.

These people are never fired from their jobs. Ever. They are the foundation of most things terrible or uninteresting. When they are challenged by anything that adds another "check mark" to their box of identity, they go into a full blown fear response.

I don't know where these people are bred, but I am pretty sure they've been "sent back" to earth lives about a thousand times. Their guardian angels are like,
"nope, they still don't get it. Maybe this time? Hey Gabriel, can you send in that Melodee person in their lives around the time they are feeling pretty confident? Yeah, maybe that'll mix it up a bit. Tell Melodee I'm sorry for doing that to her, but she signed up to help out here so.... that's on her. Besides, she'll kind of think it's funny." 

You know what makes me laugh the hardest about really average people? Their defense of things they like as though it's a core element to their body being able to function. If you don't like something they like, or mistakenly say, "I just can't stand that movie..." They look at you as though you said their kid was ugly and has a misshapen head. Meaning... their reaction is as if they made the movie themselves!  You didn't make the movie. Some Jewish guy in the Bronx made that movie, a production crew the size of Rhode Island edited it and the story came from a book written 50 years ago! So even the guy who made the movie didn't really create the movie... you know? Why are you acting like you birthed it from your own normal average nothing loins?

Ugh. These people hate to argue and I have a theory as to why. They have never thought about the possibility that someone could disagree with them about something they've just taken into their life hook, line, and sinker.  The comedian brain loves to be challenged by an argument. 

"Oh you don't like Battlestar Galactica? Why? I'm just curious," says the comedian brain. 
"I just hate space stuff, it's stupid and not real," says normal stupid person brain.

(they aren't normal stupid brain because they don't like Battlestar Galactica by the way... they are stupid and a waste of air because they have no idea why they don't and can't explain it any other way than saying... it's just space things and not real.) 

Then the comedian brain will say, "Did you like the show Friends?" 
They will say, "Omg I love that show." 
Then the comedian will say,  "well that's not real? Do you have 6 friends that you accept altruistically and allow to come into your apartment uninvited and be weird on your couch for a weekend..bring their weird date of the week over and eat up your food, cause chaos in your life, mess up your furniture? You have seen that in your life?" 

"No. Whatever. You know what I mean," says normal stupid brain person. 

"I do know what you mean, but I'm saying that you don't know what you mean," says comedian. 

My biggest peeve is being called, "clever." If someone calls you "clever," it is a slam. Period. What they are really saying is, "You think you are really f**ing smart don't you?"  
Smart? Yes. Yes I do. Smart is not clever. Smart is just being knowledgeable about things, having common sense, and using all your senses to navigate through life. 

Clever implies that you are looking for traps and loopholes to ensnare people so you can APPEAR smart... which isn't smart. I don't want to appear smart, I want to BE smart. If I am rationalizing some ridiculous thing someone says and making them think about how ludicrous their logic is, that's not me being clever. That is me trying to understand and wanting you to "play ball" and hit me with your best explanation of something so that maybe I'll learn something I don't already know. 

In other words... SELL it to me. I want to buy what you are offering, which is you, but you aren't selling it to me. You are making me extremely uninterested in "getting to know you further." Why would I want a friendship with anyone who has no idea why they feel the way they do about things? 

Would you buy a car that you know you'll have for at least 10 years if the salesman can't tell you why it's better than the car sitting next to it?  Then you'll ask, "why is this car 1000 dollars more than the one sitting next to it?" And the salesman will say, "well, it's got a really high maintenance oil filter, computer navigation system is run via satellite, and the engine is extremely sensitive to cold or extreme heat."  Um... why is that a selling point? "well, it's consistent, it gets good gas mileage, and we can offer it to you for 5% APR," says the salesman. 

So you think about it... Okay wise guy, tell me about the other one that is cheaper and it's in the color I like.... and the salesman says, "I don't know really? I just don't like it, and you shouldn't either. This one is better." 

Well... now I don't want a car. Now I'm buying a motorcycle because it has good gas mileage, it's cheaper and I"ll look really f-ing cool.  Sure, I may die in an epic Michael Bay style death on I-35, but at least I won't have to talk to people like you again. 

Does that sound negative? It's not. Its funny. You know what I think Jesus is probably the most pissed off about regarding how his life was remembered? Nobody got his jokes. There's this document that a Roman guard wrote down who was ordered to "keep tabs on this Jesus guy," and in this document which you can find for yourself, it reads like someone's personal investigative diary... 
"The Nazarene they call Jeshua, is seen laughing a lot with the men who follow him. Upon him gazing at me or my consorts, his face turns harsh and severe. I have noted this handsome man laughing in the face of adversity." 

So imagine Jesus cracking up with Peter, John, and the crew and they say, "Jesus, man, that guard is over there writing stuff down about you. Seriously, turn around look... he's watching you...." 

Jesus spins around in mid laugh and then goes straight mad face at the guard... holds it for a few seconds... spins back around and starts laughing again. That is a comedian brain. 

Where does comedy come from if not from a divine birds-eye view of the world? If you can't laugh at the most unlucky set of situations and think of how absurd it is that all those terrible things happen to coincide on the same day, then you are far too attached to your body. Sure you'll be angry or sad at times, that's normal, that's healthy. 
But if you don't have the little voice in your head that says, 

"look at you. You are so flippin' angry over running over a nail. A tiny piece of metal is your arch nemesis?" Then you might(if you have a comedy brain) think about some wild fictitious scenario like Iron Man having to face off in the 4th movie with a 7 story tall rusty nail and it almost defeats him because he didn't get a tetanus vaccine at the urging of Pepper Pots who is all granola-ee about western medicine... then Iron man rethinks his relationship with Pepper and says "maybe I missed the mark with that one," but only after seeing NYC destroyed by a sentient rusty nail. " 

All of this could be a creative coping mechanism that you have in order to get some distance on yourself when you are having a bad day. It eases the tension of the series of unfortunate events so that you can sleep that night and not believe that the minutia of the world is out to destroy you. 

True story: 
I had this employer once who was very affluent. I was getting paid a ridiculous amount of money to produce his audio book. He was so elite, had been his entire life, that he had lost all connection to the reality of most people's day to day mishaps. So... there was this one time when I had to be at the airport to meet him because we were going to interview someone who would be marketing the audio book. I drove a 1992 Cadillac Eldorado. It was a sweet car. So sweet that people routinely tried to steal it. Not people, but gang members. I lived in downtown Dallas in a loft that was in a "rad" part of town but not an area that you'd want to be walking around in after 1:00am.

 I got up to head out to the airport. I wasn't going to fly anywhere. I was going to have a meeting in the Grand Hyatt lounge with some other douchebag rich guy who had a layover at DFW) The previous time we had a meeting at this lounge, my car had been broken into and all the tires slashed. True story, true fact. Okay... so I will continue. 

In the parking garage at my place was a huge vending machine supply truck that was blocking ONLY my car. Where are the vending machines at? I'll find this guy and get him to move. Hey, at least nobody can steal my car this time.  Thirty minutes later and I'm fuming with rage at the audacity of my crummy luck, the guy comes out and is drinking a smoothie, laughing hard on his cell phone with someone who was on speakerphone. This guy had one of those slow deliberate walks that only white trash people have. The only thing missing was a half smoked cigarette hanging from his top lip or he would've fit the white trash clone stamp. He knew I was waiting to leave because he gave me the side eye acknowledgment and then says to his phone mate, "anyways... h'yeah, I hear y'ah man. I do. I rhhhhealllly do. (insert white trash red neck forced laugh) " 

This dude BURNED ME UP. I knew if I confronted him, it would only stall him from leaving, so I patiently swallowed my own stomach acid and he backed out.   Boom, I'm off like a shot. Driving hard n' fast. Trying to text this asshole who I worked for and said, "yeah, I'm on my way. Vending machine truck blocked my car for 30 minutes. I didn't even know we had vending machines. ha ha" 

Driving like a swarm of pissed off hornets, I get on the highway that goes straight to the airport. Traffic comes to a complete stop. "What the hell, it's a Saturday? Where are all these people going?"

Another hour goes by and I'm sweating from rage. I realize that it's "not about me" and that everyone else is in the same stupid boat right now, but this all started with vending machine guy. Finally traffic is moving... I turn on the radio to hear if they do a Chopper 5 alert or whatever BS it is they call it... 

"This is your traffic report on the 8's... 635 westbound is experiencing a major delay due to an overturned 18 wheeler. Accident crews are on the scene now and... Breaking news... there is a hostage situation with the 18 wheeler driver and a passenger... we are trying to get details but it looks like they are shutting down all lanes of 635...."   

At this point I thought, "well, at least it's out of my control now. Clearly I'm in a situation where I can do nothing more to arrive at the airport for this stupid meeting." 

 I texted my employer and said, "Okay... so I'm on 635 westbound. If you haven't heard, they shut down the highway due to the 18 wheeler overturned and some type of hostage situation with his passenger... I don't know, that's just what the radio just said." 

This out of touch elite douchebag didn't bother to give me the benefit of the doubt and look up the traffic report himself. After all, he's sitting in a hotel lounge area with a million televisions on probably reporting about the accident and "stand off on Dallas highway." Nope. Not this guy. He's just sitting there unaware of the world going on around him.  The text streams begin to pop up on my phone... 

"Mel. If you didn't want to have the meeting, then just say so." (said douchebag) 

To which I replied with a picture taken from inside the car, looking out of the windshield at thousands of parked cars on 635. I sent a GPS pinged map of my location. Proof right? Wrong. 

"Don't don't do that Mel. You are only making it worse." (said douchebag employer) 

To which I replied, "because I'm texting and driving? Or... " 

"Ah yes, very clever Mel. Very clever. No... you know what you're doing." (said douchebag employer)

**At this point my brain has committed mutiny. A full scale assault on my logic processor is being waged and I have no way of understanding his perspective. I really can't explain how much this kind of situation happens in my life, but I can tell you that it has been at least 100 times that I've come across a situation that has no end that would result in "oh that's what you meant. Okay... whew!" Nope. I don't get the sweet relief of "look at what a crazy misunderstanding that was.. laugh laugh... oh man... you really had me goin'...." Nope. Doesn't happen. ** 

When I finally had the ability to exit the highway, I just drove back home. What was the point? I surrender to the shitty day. "Y'got me shitty day! You got me." 

I get back to my place and guess who is waiting for me? That's right. My employer. Tapping his foot at the front door of the building and reading the Washington Post. His face was beat red and he had a look in his eyes that was full blown crazy. 

"Where were you?! I've been sitting here for over 20 minutes. How did you know I was coming over here! I have half a mind to fire you from this deal and that is sad Mel because you will lose a lot of money and you are quite good and I just don't know why you go to such great lengths to lie to me. Do you need help Mel? Do you need actual mental help?" 

(guys... I'm not exaggerating any of this. You haven't missed anything if you are confused. In fact, you've understood my own confusion that I had at the time... just add 5 hours of bullshit to that confusion and a smattering of rage.... boom you've got it) 

So how did I react?  

Luckily for me, my discomfort (putting mildly) forced my comedy brain to grab the wheel at this point. I just went out of body for a moment. I saw the ridiculous petty insanity of all sides of the day, and I saw this multi-millionaire throwing a 2 year old style tantrum whilst holding the business section of the Washington Post, a styrofoam cup of horribly cheap coffee which he had spilled on himself, and out of the corner of my eye I saw the parking attendant(retired cop) leaving him a ticket on his windshield because he was illegally parked in a handicapped space. The parking lot attendant was drinking a smoothie. (remember vending machine guy?) My employer didn't notice this ticket thing was happening AT ALL. 

So what did I do? I started laughing. Uncontrollably. Karma right? My day was kicked off by a lazy smoothie drinking jerk off and now my douchebag employer is being bricked out by a lazy retired cop drinking a smoothie. 

I just laughed and said, "here's the thing, (laughing harder with each word) You are so out of touch with reality that you really believe I would go to such great lengths to fake driving to the airport, photoshopping a pic of me sitting in traffic, and give you a million details that you could've cross checked and confirmed but your brain created a full blown hollywood epic to understand why someone didn't make it to a meeting. You know what? There's hope for your book. 
That was some great plot twists that you just came up with and I don't know why you haven't put those skills to use in your shitty boring book that nobody is going to want to listen to or buy. Why don't you spend the night on the sidewalk and check out the bullshit that happens to everyday people, everyday. Observe and report. Welcome to the life of the regular person trying to scratch his way through any given day."  

I fobbed myself in and later I received a very long apology. Why? Not because he understood or even believed my story about the very reported-on traffic situation, but because he goes to leave and saw he had a ticket on his car and got into an full scale verbal battle with the parking lot cop who probably put him in his place pretty hard. (The parking lot cop was a retired Dallas Police officer, black dude, about 6.5 feet tall, hilarious, and gave NO cares about anyone's anything. He was getting a pay check for an easy job that supplemented his retirement plan) 

Listen to me... most people I know that are these normal stupid people brained individuals, would have ONLY this one story and it would be "the worst day of their lives."

They would be crushed by a day like the one I detailed above. CRUSHED. There would be no humor in it. They would need to cry and go back to college or some shit... it would be a pivotal moment of reckoning. "I must not be a good creative consultant or editor... if this could happen (they say crying) then I guess I'm just not cut out for that kind of life."   You're right. You're not. Bye bye.  Guess what? That kind of thing happens to me at least twice a month. I don't expect it, but I know it's the way of things sometimes and it doesn't upset my balance to the point where I lose faith in my abilities.... and I would NEVER go back to college to "find another path." EVER.  

I'd just figure out a way to make people laugh about it along with me. 

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Something Is Happening- That You MUST know

Unless you exist in a cave of illusion, you should know what is going on in the world is anything but normal.

There's a whole script going on right now that is fully dedicated to giving you "inside baseball" on the goings on of the world at large.

There will be a time, very soon, when cognitive dissonance will reign supreme in the minds of the "asleep" masses. Though I believe there are less and less people every day that believe what the news tells them to believe, I still think there are a staggering amount of you that refuse to look under the stone that is blocking your path to real freedom- emotionally and spiritually speaking.

The definition of cognitive dissonance is as follows:
Mental discomfort experienced by a person who simultaneously holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values.

Sound familiar? It should. That is the modus operandi of how we have been conditioned to feel by the enormous stinking load of crap we've been fed through media... our entire lives.

Everyone to a certain degree is intimately familiar with this feeling, but that is the tip of the veritable iceberg.

Most people only look up information to prove their point of view. They rarely approach life like a trial lawyer would who had to take the defense of the opposing side. If you don't look at all sides of the cube, you might miss something. Something that truly liberates you from social programming.

The truth.

Right now MSM News (mainstream media news outlets) are pummeling your consciousness with direct assaults on your intelligence. You are told how to feel, what to think, who is right and who is wrong.

The truth of the situations going on might shock you.

Warning: Once you dive down the rabbit hole, there's no "tie off" at the top. You can't go back to what you once knew, how you once felt, and innocence cannot be reclaimed.

You can no longer say, "I don't know, I don't really follow world events... " You can no longer look at your justice system, political party icons, or history itself in the same way.

The truth is out there. It always has been. More and more gets leaked daily by brave souls who dove down that rabbit hole years ago and have been screaming at all of us with a bullhorn from the bottom of it. "Guys, get down here. Everything is a lie. You must believe me. Is anyone listening? Someone please listen to me. It's dangerous down here alone! You must join me and together we can help each other climb out of the abyss!"

In the next week or so, expect there to be huge revelations that no MSM outlet can squander away to the back of the "tin foil hat" section of the news. The "Choice Point" has arrived.

The Choice Point Defined: It is the act that moves us from purpose and meaning, through deliberation into choice and action. And right in the middle between purpose and action is the Choice Point. There is always a fraction of a second or a minute, or days and years when we are poised at the edge of a decision or Choice Point.

Right now, the MSM news media has slammed down your throat terms like: collusion, reform, corruption, MeToo, wrong button pushed, threats from North Korea, Russian dossier, Uranium 1, Immigration, DACA, etc...

They tell you how to feel about these thing, yet they never explain what these terms mean, what the story is about or who the players REALLY are.

We are at war. Not with guns or bombs, but an information war. One side is the nasty truth, the other side is a nasty agenda chalked full of lies that stretch back decades upon decades.

The war is over control of your consciousness. If enough energy is gained through the consciousness of humanity in their favor, then they win. Period. It's the Universal Law of manifestation. We are all co-creators with The Creator element of this universe. This is the soul element, the spirit, the Quantum Entanglement of all sentient beings.  It is sacred law.

I wrote in my last blog about Operation Mockingbird.

I linked the actual PDF of the Freedom of Information Act declassified document regarding this CIA operation that began in 1956 with the goal of changing the narrative in media to fit the agenda of the Intelligence agencies by placing highly skilled operatives or "assets" inside all of the Mainstream Media News outlets. That includes newspapers, magazines, movies, music, television, ALL OF IT.  They steer the narrative they want to emotionally convince you of so that you won't see what the REAL TRUTH  is. The truth that is going on right under your nose.

If you question anything, you are a threat to the overarching lord of freedom labeled, "National Security."

Questioning your government or questioning the supposed "facts" or story that is being piped into your mind 24/7, isn't a national security threat. It's being a patriot, a hero, and it's the right thing to do for all people, not just your biased political party's belief.

Throughout history, people who spoke the truth or questioned authority were killed, shamed, publicly discredited, or faded away in a mental institution or prison system with a label of "crazy" strapped to their head.

So people stopped questioning, stopped looking behind the curtains, and out of a justified fear of being dead (at worst) or losing the credibility they once had with family, job, and friends, they went along with the program.

Some people decided to get smarter than the evil select few who were trying to take over the world.

They learned that in order to prove their point, to show the truth to the masses, they would have to play a sinister game of cat and mouse. They would have to gather information together in secret, steal it if they had to, and they had to know that the risk involved was prison or worse.
Would it be worth it? Yes. Yes it would.

Just like the elite factions of all world governments, these rebels for The People also know how consciousness works.  If the TRUTH could reach the masses, or even some of them, it would exponentially grow into the minds of everyone, everywhere.

A Singularity would occur eventually. It may take time, but eventually it would saturate the populace so that at the very least, you could decide for yourself which way you will go. If you are only getting a lie, and the opposing view of that lie is just another lie, then you are further away from the truth. If however, the truth is leaked, "their" words are used against them, their secret agendas splayed out for all to see, then humanity might have a shot at beating the evil slave system we all live in. We are all slaves. If you aren't the select few that are at the tippy top, you are just rowing the boat for them. Period. Yet... if we knew that, we'd mutiny. So how do they keep us quiet?

By making you think you have a choice. Republican or Democrat? CNN or Fox? Paper or Plastic? Intolerant or Tolerant? Rich or Poor? Green or Gas?  When in fact, there are thousands of options that have been suppressed. Control is the name of the game, folks. If "they" make the choices, they know how to control the narrative, i.e. they control You.

This is how a video goes "viral" on YouTube. Remember, all the viral videos begin with one person viewing them. How does a woman wearing a stupid Chewy mask in her mini-van go from being a homemaker average person to having 8 million people viewing her "hilarious" semi-private laugh session in her car- overnight?

If something like that can go from 0 to 8 million people in less than 24 hours, then why doesn't this leaked info from heroic whistleblowers reach that level of saturation?

The reasons will or won't shock you.

1. At the point of saturation, it is de-monitized and downgraded in view counts by a systematic agenda that is funded by deeply shadowed government agencies. Twitter, Facebook, Google, all of them are filtering out anything that could turn the tide of the information war we are living in. Don't believe me? Look at the latest videos taken by Project Veritas. Twitter shadow banned millions of people who were speaking out about corruption of the Deep State.  I've seen ex-military intelligence officers who are speaking the truth on YouTube have their entire accounts, subscribers, and view count completely dismantled overnight.  They are silenced by a nameless corporation and "flagged as inappropriate or in violation of community guidelines." Why? What were they doing wrong? Telling the truth.

2. People watch stupid stuff more than they watch things that are trying to tell them to wake up and smell the rotten fish. We have grown weary of "bad news" and depressing subjects. We just want to watch puppy videos or share dumb cat memes. Those cute videos don't create cognitive dissonance. We can't handle any more uncomfortable truth, right?

Well I'm here today to tell you that you had better strap in for the ride of your life or bury yourself in puppy videos because the largest dump of "red pills" is about to hit your consciousness whether or not you want it to. It HAS to.

Do you want to live in a world controlled by a secret shadow government that has reigned supreme for eons? Do you want to live in a world where your family and friends are sent off to fight in a war that has nothing whatsoever to do with freedom!? Do you want to live in a world where you are told how to feel about everything from meaningless words like "shithole" to being labeled a "racist" just because you described someone as "latin, white, black, asian." Or do you want to be labeled a backwards hillbilly because you saw someone that looked female to you, and you said, "thank you ma'am," but they "identified as a man," and now you are an intolerant asshole when you truly meant no harm?

Do you think people are really this trivial? No. You've been duped ladies and gentleman. Duped. The Mainstream Media starts the trends that you swallow hole and accept as "change." They start the fire, you fan the flame. That's how it works.  Their fanning was free. The young Millennials who are addicted to social media were happy to feel important and needed. After all, they were handed iPads instead of socialization from birth. The fishhooks were already in their consciousness by the time they were old enough to matter, and the Deep State just reeled 'em in. They spout off judgment and labels faster than any secret social programming ever expected them to. They love feeling justified and like the 'good person' fighting the fight from the comfort of their gaming chair.

Don't worry, the older generations aren't off the hook either. You've been programmed in the "long game." Those strings are sewn into the very fabric of who you are. You may not be baited by an unexpected social justice movement on Twitter, but you have sealed any holes you might have left open for a "change of heart" long ago.

These movements that have millions of people seemingly "overnight," and concerted social media attacks on people or groups, or or or....
It's all controlled, directed, planned, and there's always either an agenda or a distraction outcome.
Distraction from the REAL news. The news that might call out the corruption of the people who are signing the checks for these "movements." These movements aren't organic anymore. They are funded by people like George Soros who are masterminds at social programming and public swaying for an ultimate goal that suits the powerful elite factions of the Deep State.

Notice how these massive corporations like Google or Exxon or Samsung are all making socially conscious ads now? Do you think they care about that? No. They started to see that the world was waking up to higher ideals like loving kindness and unity and they simply were scared of profit loss. If you found out they were evil and literally creating artificial intelligence to spy on everything you do, learn your behaviors, your driving routes, because they care about you, you'd call BS on that in a second.

Think. Think. Research. Be a citizen journalist. Do you care about the future of your life? Your kids life? Are you happy walking on egg shells?  Do you need media to tell you what is appropriate to think, feel, or be?  Do you?

Below is a list of VERY recent things that the mainstream news never reported on or redirected you away from by focusing on something else:

1.  Vegas Shooting & Saudi Arabia corruption round up. It was pitched to you as though the Saudi government takeover was a bad thing. It was a GREAT thing. The new Prince Salman rounded up the old regime of corrupted officials/elite family crime syndicates who had been in power for over 40 years and quarantined them in a hotel room, froze their assets, and they will probably be in prison for the rest of their lives.
Why does this matter to you? It shouldn't but it does, because the pockets of these corrupt Saudi officials were intrinsically linked with the good ol' United States. Notice how the ISIS attacks have died down? Kind of hard to convince paid mercenaries to stage attacks when they aren't getting the check in the mail.  The Saudi corruption implicated tons of our banks, and your charitable contributions, tax money and stock holdings were funding everything from child trafficking to paying for terror attacks... all in the name of good ol' Petroleum trade and fake wars to take over countries with it.
 Did you know that the current US Administration was meeting with Prince Salman to discuss his plan of rounding up these corrupt officials at the same time the Vegas Shooting happened? Who was in Las Vegas at the time of that shooting? The very people who were going to assist King Salman in his corruption truth lasso. Coincidence? No. Good news is, the bigger and more terrible outcome that these sick and twisted shadow elite deep state syndicates wanted to happen, didn't. Although, it was still a terrible body count, and the MSM news pulled a "this is who did it," and dropped the "Largest mass shooting event ever in the United States," from it's list of "important" stories.  People who had cell phone footage of multiple organized shooters at various locations were silenced. People who came forward on night of the incident, innocently claiming that they saw multiple armed shooters, couldn't get out of the exits because the gates were locked, the blasting lights of the venue were beaming at their face... all to just create a pool of chaos so that some evil sadistic plan could unfold and mass casualties would result.  If you still think it was ONE guy that did all that, I feel sorry for you.

2. Uranium 1. A deal brokered by the Clintons to sell Uranium to Russia. This deal was followed through by the Obama Administration and was kept "secret" from the government.  Loads of money was made but none of it went into our country. It went into the pockets of the players who brokered the deal and the foundations they own under the label "charity."  People are being arrested as I'm typing this. It was a cover up on a massive scale and it stinks to high heaven. It's a big deal.

3. Haiti- Haiti is a shithole. Why? Because they never received the BILLIONS of dollars of relief aid that was donated worldwide and filtered through the Red Cross and the Clinton Foundation. In fact, the orphaned children following the 2010 Earthquake were being "taken to a better place" by a woman who worked for the Red Cross and she was busted for child trafficking. She was bailed out of prison by none other than Hilary Clinton. Her name was Laura Silsby. Also I advise you to look for the video of a member of the Haitian senate who stood up and "told it like it was," during a town hall meeting during the 2016 Presidential Campaign. His name: Bernard Sansaricq.  Back in the 90's, he refused to be bought or paid off by the Clinton Foundation and they revoked his work Visa and status within the government.  His testimony is powerful, and I urge all of you to watch it.

**When you go down the Rabbit Hole and look up this stuff, you'll find the top hit on most of it comes from who labels things as "debunked or hoaxes." Snopes is completely funded and created by George Soros. Soros is equivalent to Senator Palpatin from Star Wars. DARK SIDE.**

4. Executive Order Signed on December 21 that freezes all the assets and properties of anyone who was compliant with, assisted in, or contributed to- Human Rights Violations. This includes corporations, charities, individuals, etc.. Also, it includes persons who are affiliated with these organizations or corporations that may have fled to other countries. The Clinton's house fire happened shortly after this was issued. Also... the bizarre airport outages, rerouted flights, and strange emergency landings of aircraft. At one point on January 2nd/3rd (depending on what time zone you are in), all the major US Airports had computer system failure. Why? Not to worry. It was the good guys who did this. Nobody is escaping their crimes against humanity this time. No where to run, nowhere to hide. Period.  I urge you to look at (Executive Order Blocking the Property of Persons Involved in Serious Human Rights Abuse or Corruption.)

**Did you hear about this on Mainstream Media? No. It's literally the biggest round up of evil sick corporation corruption and twisted elite cabal syndicate crime families in the history of the planet. 72 CEO's mysteriously "stepped down" following this EO being signed.... And there are almost 10,000 Sealed Indictments that have been issued since then. The first to be opened is the one on Uranium 1.**

5. Pizzagate or Pedogate. What is it?  If you type it in, the immediate top hit is from Soros funded Snopes claiming it is nothing more than a crazy conspiracy. It isn't. Just ask Corey Feldman... Yep, Pizzagate or Pedogate was busted out in the WikiLeaks Vault 7 data dump that also contained the infamous "Hilary emails."  Shortly after the data dump of the corruption charges within the DNC, Seth Rich was dead. Seth Rich was the leaker to Julian Assange and he was tattling on the DNC and the corrupt crap that they were doing to secure the election and screw over Bernie Sanders in the process. Within these emails were back and forth emails between the Podesta brothers and others that contained terms like, "Pizza and hotdogs." There were so many of these emails that a few very smart investigative journalist started scratching their head. The "pizza and hotdogs" seemed to be "supplied" by a local pizza place and specifically the owner of this establishment was listed in the emails. The terminology was so bizarre and seemed to be irrelevant to the emails surrounding it, that these investigative freelance journalists began digging. Julian Assange of Wikileaks also dropped breadcrumbs kind of pointing out where they needed to dig deeper. The result is something so unspeakable and so ingrained and deeply rooted in the world of Washington DC's elite as well as Hollywood, that it makes you want to take a scalding hot shower.   I won't get into details here but if you don't believe me, then I'll give you one seemingly "benign" thing to look up.

**Look up Tony Podesta's Art collection.  (CEO of The Podesta Group, which has now been dismantled as of December 2017) **
The investigative journalist who "broke the story on Mainstream media's Huffington Post," was fired and had to go into hiding. He is unemployed now, and has re-emerged with thousands of people watching his videos and testimony on YouTube. Although, I will add that Twitter banned him for life for saying what I'm saying in this blog regarding Operation Mockingbird.  His name is David Seaman. There are many, many, many more out there who are speaking up about the horrors of pedophile rings in Washington and Hollywood and worldwide. It's all connected though and it is all part of a much darker and sinister ideology.   If you want to get REALLY Red Pilled, watch the documentary "An Open Secret" about pedophile rings in Hollywood, and if that didn't do it, then look up MK Ultra Survivor Kathy O'Brien. (She's been trying to bring these sickos to justice since the 90's and her story is hard to watch, but if you want to know the truth, you must face the monsters. It is the only way the world will change and this nightmare of control will end.)

6. You will be seeing justice. It is happening. Why now? Despite my personal feelings about a big orange Reality TV star running the country, I will say this... He had to be the one in the White House. I know how that sounds to those of you who can't fathom it, I couldn't either. Hear me out.. All of the things I listed above, and more, have been going on for a long long long time. The system was all in "collusion" with each other. It was all rigged. It was all like a big WWE Smackdown match but behind the scenes, everyone shook hands and knew the "plan was effective." Things I don't have time to cover but will tell you to look up in the rabbit hole: Fusion GPS, Adam Schiff Treason, DNC Hack, What happened to Seth Rich, Prescott Bush, Operation Paperclip, Declassified JFK documents, and so so so so so much more. So much more. The SAME players are in ALL OF IT.

Trump might have got through the cracks of that corrupt system by "stumbling backwards into a pot of gold." There are people on the inside, military people, good people in the FBI, CIA, NSA, DOJ, DOD, that have been waiting to have the opportunity to bust out of the stable doors. They couldn't do it before because every facet was predicted and controlled by key players who  all had the same agenda- the American people had no idea about. Now they can do more because the grip has loosened on their reigns. That's why we are seeing Executive Orders being signed to take down the very assets and properties of these evil people. Trump isn't the cause of this, but he's the reason it can be ignited. 

We are the pawns to the Deep state and cabal syndicate banking families.  The world government agenda has been systematically played out since the dawning of the Federal Reserve. Those who opposed the Federal Reserve were sent on a luxury cruise line... The Titanic. (I'm not lying, that is a fact. *see Astor Family*) Since then, it's been a big phat chess game with your consciousness, your money, your well-being, your LIFE. Understand this. 

I know it's depressing but it is far MORE depressing to think that this is "just how life is I guess." I guess I'm supposed to die of cancer right when I retire from my job that I slaved away at for 40 years. I guess I won't get to see the world after all because I have to keep working so that I can pay for basic human needs and hope that nothing unexpected happens to me because if it does I'm SCREWED... I guess I'll put all my dreams aside because society tells me that's stupid or irresponsible. I guess I'll get around to this or that when I get some time off. I can't take any time off because I can't afford to lose even one check... and if I do take my PTO but I get sick, then how am I going to be able to afford to go to the doctor?  





In closing... I'm not crazy. I'm just crazy enough to think that God gave me this brain that is obsessively curious for a reason. I am not crazy. I am just crazy enough to feel that human beings, animals, and the air we breath should not be at the mercy of a select few who pull the strings.  I'm not crazy. I'm just crazy enough to think by speaking loudly about this, we might be able to change the paradigm.   If I didn't blog, talk freely, speak my mind, break the mold... then I wouldn't be fulfilling my contract to the Universe. I want to see the world I love flourish without hidden tyranny. I want to see my Dad be able to stop working and live freely. I want to see kids NOT die of cancer. I want to see animals respected instead of living in disgusting environments where they are suffering so that we can have fast food when we want it.  I want to live to see the barriers of culture, race, religion and political affiliations be shattered with loving kindness. I hope the one day I will live to hear this sentence, "I can't believe we use to bomb people."  That is why we must slay the monsters. If you don't want to face it, I get it, believe me I do. But step aside and allow other's to uncover the lies without the ridicule. Deal? You'll be glad you did. 

Monday, December 11, 2017

One Ring To Rule Them ALL

I lived in Los Angeles back in 2004 and 2005. The disillusionment I suffered upon arrival in that God forsaken town forever changed me. For those of you reading this that have not been there or lived there, and only see the images created by the media machine, I'm here to tell you that it is nothing short of being the most spun web of lies ever told.

In the recent news, daily it seems, we see the #MeToo claims and lists of various celebrities and directors/producers that are being called out on their past acts of deplorable behavior.

Of course there are those who want to say that it is nothing more than a witch hunt, that there's nothing driving it other than the liberal media, but that isn't true. 

In fact, the mainstream media is not reporting it as much as it is actually occurring, which is why there seems to be so many claims surfacing like a bursting boil of whistleblowers, leakers, and movements surrounding the hashtag MeToo.

Our first big whallop of intel was on the producer/director, Harvey Weinstein. This seemed to come out around the time of the Las Vegas shooting incident. These things seem unrelated, but they are anything but. Before you log out of this blog, here me out. I'm NOT saying that Harvey Weinstein had anything to do with Vegas. He didn't. However, as we know now, Mr. Weinstein was only the first among hundreds of  intel leaks on various celebrities.  It seems to be a much bigger secret that is being revealed, possibly one that has cords that stretch and weave in and out of all the most powerful positions within the United States. 

The Vegas shooting smells like a rotten case of "solved too easily, all questions answered." In fact, very few questions were answered, and it seemed to disappear from the press shortly after it happened. Odd, isn't it? I mean, it's 2017, almost 2018 and we STILL speak of the OKC bombing, Waco, Colorado movie theatre shooting, 911, etc...  What was the difference between these massive attacks and the Vegas shooting?  We the people and our Cell phones, filming, tweeting, snapchatting, Facebooking, YouTubing, Instagramming,  texting, etc...
This is why the fear driven narrative, or cut n' dry "who done it and why,"  disappeared from the media.

Within 24 hours of the Vegas shooting, hundreds of videos were being tweeted and posted on social media accounts that either captured audio or video of multiple shooters, locked gates that were previously unlocked,  and more. Sadly, anyone who has come forward has mysteriously "disappeared or died in an accident."  Look it up. Last I checked, the death or disappearance tally was up to 6 persons.

Of course, the interview on Ellen Degeneres's show featuring  Jesus Campos (the supposed security guard who was on the scene) was clearly a rehearsed statement that left more questions than it did answers. (for me anyway)

 And why did this man go on a mid-day show like Ellen, instead of being questioned by supposed "legitimate" journalists? Ellen is a stand-up comedian. I'm just saying.

When you have an 'asset' that isn't fully trained in the alphabet soup agencies narrative,  "here's how you lie without looking like you are lying" program, you "test him out" on a mid-day show geared towards housewives and low income earners who work late nights, work from home, or are retired middle income Apple Pie Americans.  In other words, the most forgiving audience. The audience with the most blind spots in their logic. 

**I'm not saying Ellen's show isn't an entertaining one, but it's NOT serious investigative journalism. And a "eye witness" like Jesus Campos should be coming out on something with a bit more weight than Ellen.**

The "No Such Agency" and "Clowns In America" agencies throughout history -have assets.
Definition of a military asset: equipment such as communication devices, ships, planes, radar, or any employed military operative utilized in a military operation. 

These are skilled operatives that can blend into normal everyday life as easily as a homeless bum blends in under a bridge in Downtown Dallas. They are "normal" looking, have seemingly normal admin jobs, are routinely seen in public places like casinos, concerts, bars, events, and they have a crutch of some sort typically. Whether this crutch is part of their cover or a part of their coping, it exists and if the asset is compromised, the "crutch" or "flaw" is usually the culprit to the media cover story. Within the strata of 'assets' you have ranking. Some assets are valuable, some are disposable. Some are somewhere in the middle.

"Paddock collected and bought illegal weapons and had a deep gambling debt."  The masses who are asleep and believe anything they see on the news, think to themselves, "oh, yeah, well that's why then... yep, he was clearly unstable... no wonder. Well, thank God they got 'em."  Also, remember that around 30 minutes after the Vegas shooting, the wrong narrative leaked out to the media and then never resurfaced. Remember that? It was the ISIS narrative. It was so obviously the vetoed intel, it was immediately scrubbed and never mentioned again. However, if you were a late night insomniac like me, you remember the various intelligence "discoveries" they "tried out" before they just went for the lamest one and stuck with it... kind of. The reporters don't know, they are only reporting what is being given to them from various sources  from the top down.

What is the 'top down'... Do the research on Operation Mockingbird.
This is a FOA document that is easily downloaded in PDF.  In a nutshell, for those of you who don't have the time to nerd out on some declassified documents garnered from the Freedom of Information Act:
Operation Mockingbird was an alleged large-scale program of the United States Central Intelligence Agency that began in the early 1950s and attempted to manipulate news media for propaganda purposes.  (not alleged. You can download the actual copies from the FOA department. OR... if you can't be bothered, I'll enclose a link to the download at the bottom of the blog) 

Someone who is 65 years old managed to smuggle up dozens of automatic weapons into a very popular hotel during a music festival weekend, wire his girlfriend 100k, and have the energy to load and reload very advanced automatic weapons within minutes, break the glass (it's triple reinforced glass, if not stronger) and wipe out hundreds of people in a short amount of time, kill himself, and then make sure a note is left within plain view for the authorities to effortlessly find upon entering his hotel room.  That is only a fraction of the holes in the story, and I'm not even counting the hundreds of cell phone videos or audio, dashcams in cabs, that paint a very different picture.

Within hours, the mainstream was spouting his name, interviewing his brother, and trying to paint a huge backstory of this guy being raised by a Top 10 Most Wanted father. The brother poo-poo'd that theory stating that they never had contact with their father, were primarily raised by their mother. The brother of Paddock was not going to pipe down from his "this is really weird, I don't know how this happened, I just saw him, I can't understand this, this smells fishy..."   Two weeks later, Paddock's brother is arrested for child pornography.  What a great way to make someone disappear and completely discredit him at the same time. 

Of course, he very well may have had child porn but the whole thing seems pretty perfect since he was about to go on all the media outlets to demand an independent investigation of the "evidence" against Paddock. If you saw the interview with Paddock's brother, you can see how his personality was. He was not a meek and mild guy. He was outraged and very vocal about how he couldn't believe his brother was to blame for all that carnage. He was kind of an out-of-the-box guy in the sense of how verbal he was and uncensored immediately upon the media's multiple reporters showing up at his house. *

**Side note: Stephen Paddock worked at connected company in conjunction to Lockheed Martin back in the 80's doing administrative accounting work... sound familiar to the 'asset' requirements? He owned apartment complexes(a classic cover), and had many lavish frivolities including a private plane that he paid to have parked at Love Field Airport in Dallas, Texas. Routinely spent 10 to 20 thousand dollars a day at casinos, had multiple properties, etc.. Just a normal guy, right? Wrong. He was an asset. A disposable asset. Somewhere in the legalese of his contractual obligations was the risk of being compromised publically if something went wrong. Most of these 'assets' get their millions of dollars being private contractors in groups like Black Water or other mercenary, private security type outfits. Yet, it's all connected, and the paper trail never makes it back to the good ol' Clowns In America agency or whomever funded the entire operation.**

During the same time of the Vegas shooting, we have the accounts coming forward regarding the sexual abuse involving Harvey Weinstein.  This was the catalyst for many, many, many others who have spend countless amounts of money, in some cases Slush Fund money, to cover their sexual misdeeds. 

The lists of senators, congressmen, corporate execs, celebrities, media personalities, is growing daily. Of course, if you are one of the people who are only watching CNN or some other huge media company's slant on the news, you haven't seen the full fallout.  Why are they keeping this information on such a short leash?  Why is the senate trying to block other news sources like RT or Drudge Report? Why is Google moving the search results of these news sources further down on the search results? Are they saying too much? Are they not going along with the power player's clearly fake slant on various supposed intel?  It's all so obvious. For those of you wanting to blame POTUS for this, don't. This is far deeper than the office of the President of the United States. I am not a cheerleader for Donald Trump either.  However, he is becoming a big thorn in the side of the corruption that has been going on in this world for at least a hundred years. Whether or not he realizes he is a thorn in their side is irrelevant. He isn't what they had planned on, and the leaks are coming out in an embarrassing stream of shame regarding the fabricated narrative of Russia having anything to do with rigging our elections. The power elite can't control someone like Donald Trump because he's irrational and a fuse that gets set off by everything.  This doesn't make him a good president, it just makes him the right one for what needs to be uncovered right now which is nothing short of pure evil. 

In the last couple of months, these sexual scandals and Vault 7 leaks have exposed everything from pedophile sex trafficking rings to private airplanes supported by the Clinton Foundation that go to an island full of sex trafficked underage women, funding by Podesta's disgusting brother Tony's child torture art collection (featured in various Art circles as being "deep"), and the corruption within everything from the Red Cross, Senate, Congress, ABC, NBC, NPR, FOX, CBS and even Disney.

These elite power players are part of a network of globalist who participate in nefarious activities in a type of "boys club" that pats the back of each other and rarely gets called out for anything because everyone has dirt on everyone else in that nasty ring of powerful puppet masters. Blackmail is the name of the game, and everyone has something on everyone else when you get to the higher rungs of the ladder.

It's the oldest intelligence chess move on the planet. Nobody blows the whistle in that circle because the whistle will be blown on them. That's how it works. It must be uprooted and the "weeds must be plucked from the wheat." That's happening. That's why you are inundated with scandalous shameful information 24/7. The world of the evil elites are being exposed for the crimes against humanity and it's been a calculated take-down from the ground level. You get one to squeal, you get ten, and so on and so forth. THAT, mixed with the data dumps from Assange and other insiders, you have a very clear flow chart of why all of this is happening now. It has to, and it's been a long time coming. 

What if these sick individuals and scandals and dirty secrets were all somehow connected? Why is it that the most visible and outspoken people would risk having such dirty laundry in their lives? Why or how would they feel comfortable doing their terrible abusive sexual power plays when it could be so easily busted?  Because it wasn't easily busted. This elite power structure of Hollywood and Washington, is deeply rooted in something far more sinister. When you reach a certain level of power and money or influence, there are snakes that come out of the bushes to bait you with more power, more money, more influence.  The psychological parts to anyone who wants to "make it" in Hollywood is an unquenchable hunger to be recognized for your talent.

I know this first hand. I once pined for that same recognition. I wanted to be great, to be recognized on the street, to be adored by thousands of people across the world. I was broken and had huge amounts of talent that made me so happy to perform for people, to share with people. At the core of myself was the lonely misunderstood fractured little girl who just wanted to be loved by people, and validated for being who I knew myself to be.  This cannot be gained from the outside-in.  This hungry hungry hippo game of life within Hollywood and the political world begins and ends with EGO.  You have to have a healthy and eventually very UNhealthy ego to think that you and you alone are worthy of massive amounts of people basically worshipping what you do. What are you offering that is THAT valuable?  Is it your 'art' or is it your Ego? When the ideals driving you are higher in conscious direction, you will gain that respect from the world but without the trappings of shame, guilt, and regret for the abuse you put yourself through in order to "get fame."

Women have it rough in Hollywood. Our corrupt and moral-less society has placed value on only the material existence.  Of course, in order to not be "found out" for the devils they are, the powers occasionally throw a bone to an overweight singer, or a less-than beautiful/handsome actor, someone handicapped, etc...  That is only because the public needs to believe that Hollywood is based on talent and not on a select few's disgusting power hungry needs and agendas. 

I should mention that I wasn't one of those that wasn't "working" as an actor in Hollywood. I had stumbled backwards into several pots of gold there but the way I felt at the end of the day was nothing short of suicidal.  **Read my blog entitled, "The Dream That Changed Everything," to understand my mental state at that time.**

Early on in my life as a performer, I would meet these very charismatic men who seemed to take an interest in my talent. They were always funny, charming, slightly out of shape, and successful or respected in the world of acting/film making. I always rationalized that I must've been "lucky" to have met these people. I would think things like, "what are the chances of meeting this person and having them actually take an interest in me?"  Of course I was charming, funny, and had a quick silver tongue, attractive, and had a openness of my personality that seemed to make people want to be around me. I felt like God himself had put me in the path of 'this person' to show me that my dreams of being successful and famous as an actor were not in vain.  Yes, I'm telling you that most struggling artists find situations like this miraculous.  After all, I was 'just' Melodee Lenz from Texas who could barely read until 4th grade, was a fat kid most of her life, and bullied beyond belief. How did the lowly Melodee Lenz garner the attention of 'said' person?  It must be divine intervention, right? 

Maybe some of it was, but only in the sense of lesson learning. 

It's no divine secret or hidden mystery how I managed to find these successful and powerful people who wanted to "help me grow" as an artist.  How does a lion find the lamb? How does the fox charm the rabbit? How does the cobra hypnotize the mouse?  The predator knows your weaknesses, knows how you will react, and has been watching you for the "long game" kill shot.

A true psychopath is so intelligent that they know more about you than you know about you. They can spot someone with a pin sized hole of doubt and they can rip that hole open with their talons faster than you could realize you had a hole to begin with!

Were they always psychopaths? Some were. Some weren't. They are easy to spot once you've been taken by them. Just like every predatory person, they don't show you their teeth right away. That's too easy and they wouldn't be where they are if they did that. Remember, the rodent has a much higher intelligence than the snake. If the rodent knew the snake was watching them for a day and a half, they wouldn't come back to the same area to find food. The snake calmly sits there and seems uninterested for a long, long, long time. Then it allows the mouse to climb on it, grab the food that is sticking up out of it's cold coiled body, and eat a full dinner... then it strikes.

The mouse isn't stupid. The mouse was an optimist and felt like the world was finally making it easy for him. Maybe he now has a big powerful friend (the snake) who can guard against the Hawks or Owls or traps set by lesser predators in the woods. The mouse thinks he's really scored a perfect situation. He's seen his mouse friends get scooped up by birds, or get smashed in traps set by humans... but he's never seen any evidence of a snake killing off his friends.... so screw it, new snake friend!   The mouse doesn't realize that the snake leaves no evidence of his kills. He won't need to feed for several days after he eats a plump and satisfied/well fed mouse. He can retreat back into the shadows again. He has time to wait it out.

If you think that is an elaborate way of talking about powerful elite predators, it's not. It is a perfect description. Once you understand this fatal flaw in the 'prey' then you can see how easy it is to be gobbled up by such an obvious predator.

Power is worth more than money and is sought after more than financial gain. Sure, they go hand in hand, but when someone seeks power first, that is someone who is willing to do almost anything to keep their ego fed. A lot of us want money. Sure we do. We want money so that we can have what? Freedom. We just don't want to have to work so hard forever. We'd like to enjoy this place called Earth, see the sights, eat the food, enjoy the time we have with friends and those we love and hold dear. 

We live in a financial and economic system that is exactly patterned after the Babylonian Money Magik system. It kept a select few at the top, and everyone else it kept in a slave system only they thought they were free and taken care of. They were property of Babylon and never knew it. The harder they worked and put back into the economy, the more powerful the ones at the tippy top became. Gradually the people began connecting more, communication grew within Babylon, and the people had a universal language. When communication begins to extend past the tribe, then you have the birth of ideas, inspiration, and knowledge integration from cultures other than your own.

Perhaps the "tower of Babel" was nothing more than the destruction of this communication and the "god" that did it wasn't God, but instead was the elite who thought they were gods. The people were "scattered far and wide, and were not able to speak to each other."  The Babylonian corruption may have bought some time with that little "scattering" but eventually those same people became powerful and came back to sack the city. That's what happens. Once the truth has been shared among the people, the snake pit gets nervous every time they see a fire.

Pretty soon, everyone will have a torch and there will be nowhere to hide for these venomous snakes that have done unthinkable things in the name of power.

Among the torch bearers who are calling out the corruption, you will also have the 'assets' in place that will be MeToo'ing it up in the same public way. The asset will be found out because their information will go after someone and eventually will be debunked as false. So what do we do? We let all of this play out. Use discernment. And realize that anytime something seemingly comes out of nowhere, gets the attention of the mainstream media, and you start seeing laws being changed or activist groups in academia moving mountains to facilitate the new movement.... you have an agenda at play. 

What is the agenda? That is the rabbit hole of questioning you can have fun with. What is gained? Who loses? What sort of distraction does it cause? What age group is it targeting? How are they reacting? What is this distracting from? What legitimately beneficial movement was completely overridden by the upstart of this seemingly progressive movement? Who is standing behind it? What do they gain from it? Who profits financially? Who are they connected with? What are they trying to prevent the masses from knowing about?

These are the types of questions to ask if you want to wake up and take some ownership in your beliefs, your country, and be a responsible intelligent contributor to human life.

As far as the Hollywood corruption goes... It's not shocking. It's shocking that it has taken this long for people to realize that the game being played at the top of all huge companies, politics, and media has been preying on the innocent for eons. How does a mouse fight a dragon? A mouse doesn't. But MICE do. There are more of us then there are of them. Remember that. 

#MeToo #TheRevolutionWillBeTelevised #RedPill #Woke #SexualScandal #Pedogate #Epstein #Vault7 #WikiVault7 #OperationMockingbird #QAnon #Cabal #DarkSide
For PDF download of FOA declassified docs on Operation Mockingbird

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Dumbest Things I've Seen or Heard, LIST ONE

In my life, which has been far from average or predictable, I've managed to collect a few moments that break the brain's logic center.

I've always rationalized that these moments exist so that we can remember that things are not normal on this planet. In other words, it's the Creator's way of keeping us on our toes- so to speak.

I'll begin with a classic. 

I worked for many years at a very successful children's theatre that specialized in classic fairy tales told through the art of European style puppetry. It was a pinky's up type place set in the lavish hall of capitalism, North Park Center in Dallas, Texas.  At least once a month, if not more, there would be some aristocratic patron with her tribe of pasty white Polo shirt wearing kids that would storm the gates of the theatre first thing on a Saturday morning asking the following question:

"What time does the 10:30 show start?" 
To which, we would respond, "10:30."  (this happened all the time) 

As the years went by, the sarcasm increased and we would respond without giving these people any sort of benefit of the doubt.  At one point, when I was the owner (briefly) of this theatre, I responded to this question of "what time does the 10:30 show start" with, "clearly you know the answer to that already."  This was toward the end of my joy for this place...

Next up on the list of stupid stuff I've heard or seen involves the same place as the above example.

During the holiday season in the cathedral of Capitalism (North Park Center), we (the theatre) would always put on a production of a holiday favorite. The last year I worked at this place/co-owned it, I had employed my brother to help with set building and running the retail area/crunching numbers, etc.. 
The holiday season at North Park Center in Dallas, Texas, is the worst of humanity all crammed into a marble floored palace of overpriced bullsh** and horrible Modern Art from the Nasher Collection. (Modern art sucks. I don't care what you think, it sucks)

Anyway... just paintin' a picture of the horrible types of people that frequent that place as though it's an extension of their kid's pre-school.  Spoiled is an understatement.   Everyone at Northpark reminds me of the people in Kubrick's, "Eyes Wide Shut." Totally Bohemian Grove secret society types... miserable wives who compete with other miserable wives for the attention of their uninterested evil rich a-hole husbands who are slipping ME their phone number at their 3 year old's birthday party. Ewwww. NO THANKS.

We were putting on the production of "The Little Drummer Boy," when a woman who was covered in diamonds and holding the ears of her 6 year old male child came in and very quietly whispered with her eye brows suspiciously arched in  inquiry....

"Excuse me. Ma'am, yes, Excuse ME! Assistance please!... I have a question before I buy tickets for this. We are waiting in line for Santa and have a couple of hours to kill so this would be great but I'm concerned and I want an honest answer from you or your staff..." 

Me: Okay. Shoot. 

"Is the (reading the Marquee as though she's never read anything in her life) Little Druh-m Drummer Boy, yes, is that scary?" 

Me: Huh? Are you serious?

"Don't get smart with me blondy. (a classic insult I used to get by these types) I asked you a simple question and I expect a simple answer. Is it scary?" 

My Brother: that depends on whether you think the birth of Christ is a terrifying moment in history... your call ma'am.

"okay fine. 2 tickets please. If this scares my son, I will be talking to your manager!"  

End of that story? They saw the show. They walked out as though that whole conversation above never happened. These kinds of things kept me up at night. I would just imagine these people driving on a major highway and I started sweating.

Working at the Miami Dade County Fair at a Virtual Reality theater alongside a team of the most smartass people on the planet (including my brother), we had 5 weeks of the worst possible conditions. Tropical storm during the set up of the outdoor theatre, a rented apartment that was in Ft. Lauderdale (google map that... we drove that daily)...and of course, the idiot New Jersey-shore types that infiltrated Miami during the summer months. THE WORST. I have to say this off the record... The Jersey-shore-ish type youth are the dumbest people on the planet AND they are aggressive (usually a stupid person trait)... they react like a bunch of feral cats when you challenge their brains with 'new information.'  Hissing, swiping their long fingernails at you, fur standing up...oh I mean... hair... Anyway... you get the point.

Week 4 of the WORST GIG EVER...  
It was my brother, myself, and this dude from Philly named Jeremy. Jeremy was one of those young guys that had been in trouble for spray painting "Anarchist" type stuff on federal buildings. (he was hilarious) He looked like a member of the Beastie Boys....

Well.. We had "about had it" with Miami.  The virtual reality theater set up was an outdoor stage that looked like a bunch of leather arm chairs bolted to some graduated steps. You put on a headset and watched basically a cartoon and used your body to "score points" by "beating up the bad guy." (remember that this was Pre-Wii... so it was cool-ish back then)

So (this is relevant)... it's a bunch of chairs bolted down onto bleacher seating. It goes nowhere. It does nothing. From the audience perspective, all one would see is a group of people yelling, while seated, and shooting at stuff and saying things like "bang bang. Hello Shifty! Go!" (then screaming and stomping their feet to "score points") 
 So.... again.... imagine sitting on your couch wearing heavy goggles and just acting crazy and hoping you win a prize.
Got it? I can't stress that enough and you'll know why in a minute.

A group of wild terrible New Jersey vacationers with their stupid haircuts and gold chains came schlepping up to the booth like they were extras in Good Fellas... "Yo. Say Yo... 'ey... (whistle)... Yo so whaddit do?"  My brother explains it, thoroughly. (if you know my brother, you know what I mean by THOROUGHLY)  These stupid Jersey guys just stare at him. I step in and say, "Look, it's a game. Like a virtual reality game. You go on a quest and the more you move, the more points you score. It's 5 bucks, it lasts 10 minutes. That's the deal." 

The oldest one of the group who was probably about 25 years old, was just staring at the theatre watching people play the game. So... I walked off. That's when they got Philly Anarchy guy, Jeremy. Jeremy walks up to them, "Yo are yous guys gonna sign up or wat!? Come on man you holdin' up the line man, sign up or step off bro." 

That's when the whole crew of these idiots walked back up to pay their money to play the game/see the show... But they had ONE question before they gave us their money. And remember folks... they have stood there for over 3 cycles of people playing the game. They know what it "looks like" and what it "doesn't do." 

This is the question that we all heard, but was asked to Philly Jeremy...

"Say... so um like is it a roller coaster?" 

**even though we were in the middle of a fair ground full of loud AF Jersey vacationers, time seemed to stop and go in slow motion.... the stupidest thing ever had been said and it stopped time itself.***

Jeremy couldn't respond because the time space continuum had been altered by the stupidest thing ever so.... he just rocked back and forth and made a gurgling sound with his mouth and rolled his eyes back in his head until the Jersey guy was so weirded out that he walked off quietly.... 

My brother and I still laugh about that. It was the most epic response without being epic or really a response of any sort... which made it epic.


Next on the list of "classics" would have to be the story of the worst time of my life... 
It was after I came home injured from my tour with the circus. (true story for those of you who don't know... yes, I joined the circus at 33 years old)... I came back to ruin. No money. No nothing. I had been screwed over by everyone I knew and the karmic wheel of my past ran over me about 47 times upon arrival home. 

Several months after coming home to "hell on earth 2011," my boyfriend and I had to figure out how to make some money. He too had been run over by the wheel of fate and I couldn't help but think some of my karmic wheels had gone rogue into his world too.  I had an idea that just might work. We could sell puppets at various festivals and weekender type markets. I had made a killing back in the day selling these marionettes that looked like birds at fairs, etc...

So why not?! I spent my last dime ordering these birds in bulk. Most of the strings were broken, and I still figured it would be easier to sit up all night repairing them then it would be to send them back. brother, Logan and myself all stayed up repairing these P.O.S. bird puppets in hopes of selling them over the weekend at a craft market festival thing in east Texas.  If we sold even half of them, we could all make 500 bucks a piece. Not bad.

That didn't happen.

We set up shop. Had our tent set, display was great... had cash to give change... impressive display for the poorest and most broken down people in DFW at the time.  Across from our set up was a truck full of WOLF PUPPIES. WOLF. ACTUAL WOLF PUPS. Is that not the most white trash shit you've ever heard in your life?  Granted... I wanted one.

During this uninteresting white trash showcase of 2011, there was some snaggle toothed thin methy looking dude that was 'breaking bad' on his old school BMX bicycle. He was totally scoring or selling meth to various vendors. For sure. Actually... maybe that's me giving him too much credit. I think he might have been just a meth addict burning off the tweeks on that bike. 

With every passing minute of selling nothing and watching people irresponsibly purchase wolf puppies, we broke down our invisible light barrier... Our "bubble of invisible protection" against the dredges of society was ripping open slowly like a tear in the crack of your favorite pants.

METHod  Man- Alternative Universe Slim Shady kept rolling by and it all clicked with us that he had been yelling at us since 7:00am the previous day. We had just not "tuned into his frequency" so to speak, and didn't HEAR him.  Finally we did...

"Say... Hay... HAY... why don' yall jus' put a stick on it?" 

Me: What? 
Logan: What are you talkin' about dude? 
My brother: (just sighed and slightly growled) 

"Jus' go'on and put a stick on 'em. Like 'at right ch'er... ah STICK. Puuuut a STICK on 'em." (then he would maniacally laugh as though it was the most clever thing he'd ever thought of) 

He rolled around us for 2 full days saying those lines...
We packed up our things. We left. We cried. We were wolf-less, penniless, and had cerebral damage.

***Side note: How do you know if you are in a full blown white trash world.... Wolf Pups for sale out of the back of a truck.  Also... pale freckled Scandinavian looking people selling "authentic Native American wares." Never forget that. ***

My tattoo.
I have ONE tattoo and it's on my forearm. It is the most recognizable state in the U.S.A. Yes, I have a tattoo of the state of Texas on my forearm. It's solid black, clean lines, and fairly large.

About 2 years ago, at a professional establishment, with college educated professionals hovering with cocktails all around me, I had to engage in small talk with a group of people about my "exciting life," and blah blah blah...  This woman, around 28 years old (I looked her up after this incident of stupidity royale) said the following sentence, and may the good Lord strike me down if I'm lying...

(sigh... okay here it goes)

"Yeah so I am so sorry for asking this but like I have to ask... Did you know that your birthmark looks like exactly like the State of Texas? That is amazing! I mean what are the chances, right?" 

Listen to me people... I have a great tattoo. It is clearly a tattoo. It is clearly NOT a birthmark of amazing coincidence.  So if you are wondering how I responded to that, I can tell you very quickly... I didn't.

I worked at a newspaper in Downtown Dallas. Horrible job. Horrible. I shared an office with the County Clerk within the RECORDS BUILDING. It looked like the 4th floor in the show "Parks and Rec" where they all dreaded going. Ironically enough, I too worked on the 4th floor.

 Anyway. I met some great people that worked there for eons but there was one lady that worked there that was certifiably insane. Well... there were a few, but this one lady took the Blue Ribbon. Her name was Martha. She was from some part of South America or somewhere that speaks Spanish but with a lisssssp. I know they do that in Barthhhhelona, Spain, but she wasn't from Spain.

She wouldn't wash her hands after the restroom, she would use "cream" and just simply moisturize them. This was the first red flag I waived, though meekly, but I still WAVED it. 

Back in those days, I was very broke, very miserable, but I was trying to be healthy and keep the dream alive in any way I could. I had a very strict diet at one point. I was trying the Raw Foodist thing. This was WAY before it was "cool"... Anyway, that's relevant. I always took my lunch with me to work. It usually included several bananas (it's hard to get full on a Raw food vegan diet)...

Martha always watched me eat and made me nervous. One time when I ate garlic on some pasta, she started crying. I'm not lying. She cried and ran to the County Clerk and "told on me" for eating garlic. I mean, sure that's stinky and maybe not the best idea in the workplace, but we were in a busted ass building with rats in the stairwells... so who really cares? The whole place kind of smells like urine anyway. Garlic only helped it... and hey, it keeps vampires away... which also worked there.

ANYWAY... I digress. 

I was eating bananas one day for lunch. Martha was watching me, as usual, and she said the following with her lispy spanish accent whilst putting "dee creams on her hand for cleanings"...

"Ju' knowthhh, Bananas are berry fathenings." 
Me: Huh? No. I mean, sure they could be but it's literally all I'm eating for lunch.

"Ju' gets fat eating banana. Dey are berry berry fatthenings." 
Me: Okay Martha. I got it. I'm going to get fat. I don't care. I'm hungry.

"No no no ju' think about dis things. Ju' alway es'thrying to looooose weight, no? Banana is berry fatthening. Berry. "  "Banana having lots of fatthening tings in dems. Wheats, de rice, fats, es'corns..." 

Me: (I stop eating) Wait... what? Did you just say that bananas have wheat, rice, fats and corn in them? Like, INSIDE the bananas?  Is that what you are saying to me?

"J'yess... corns, es'fats, wheat, rice, all those tings. Berry fatthening, banana.... berry." 

**My friend and I would only bring bananas to work after that. And my friend one time said, "Oh Mel, look, my banana has a hot pocket in it?"  Then I said, "No shit?! Oh my GOD, mine is really fattening today... a whole pepperoni pizza" Then we build the joke from there..... Martha quit. *

...To be continued....