Saturday, September 30, 2017

Our 'True Colors' Lie

Personality tests...

We've all taken them. From "which Star Wars character am I," to more dignified ones like the Meyer's Briggs test.

Recently, I had to take, in a group setting, a personality test called, "True Colors." If anyone has taken this test, you know that there are 4 colors. Gold, Green, Blue, and Orange make up the outcome of this test. I enjoyed the workshop, the person who was doing the training was knowledgeable, fair, and had a good sense of humor.

However, as I was sitting in my tiny group of 2 other people who scored the same on the test as I did, I couldn't help but notice how easy it is to feel separate from everyone else in the room.  This separation is a reality, but I think that it is a very sketchy road that often leads to ego.

It's no secret that I have always felt different from most of society. It has been a real struggle at times to try and understand why people do what they do. I have had a terrible time trying to respect traditions that most people hold dear. Weddings, funerals, baptisms, girls night, college fraternities, groups of any kind, patriotism, sports team loyalties... it's all sort of lost on me.

The paradox is that I know we are all 'One' with each other. We are all sharing a planet, air, we all die, we were all born, and yet, we have been trained to be competitive instead of cooperative, individuals instead of brothers, and we find solace in our own ego's need to separate itself and we label it "self confidence." It is an attribute instead of a handicap to be self-confident. It is a notable quality to be self-reliant instead of cooperative. It is sought after to be a king instead of serving the people. We love autonomy and despise collective co-ops.

We see the news and feel empathy for English speaking countries and view anyone who we can't understand as numbers and say, "Oh isn't that a tragedy what's happening over in 'name a country with non-english speaking people' wow, thousands of people died in that earthquake yesterday, so sad...." Yet it's all on the surface, our words are like paint on a brick wall. We still know it's a brick wall, the material we have covered in paint is still the same texture and still segmented bricks held together with concrete mortar.

This is the truth. As hard as it is to admit it, we all know that this is how we are.  On a micro level, we continue this distortion of our true Selves by seeking to "know thyself" by taking various personality tests.  The objective of the particular test I took at work the other day, True Colors, was to see how to relate to others and how to navigate a better sense of communication with our work culture in its various personalities that make up the company and it's implementation of ideals.

However, for the days following this True Colors workshop, I overheard so many people claiming their color as an excuse for being demanding, rude, or stupidly neurotic over things.

"The way you said such and such really hurt my feelings, and as you know, I'm a Blue, so I feel more than you do."

My knee jerk reaction, which I didn't react with but wanted to was, "Well, I'm a Green and I don't care about holding your hand through this project... so walk it out."

I didn't say that. I wanted to. Badly. However, I realized that both of our ego's were searching for ways to communicate and falling short of our goal, or worse- we didn't even understand what the goal was in the first place.

Knowing and understanding what I learned about the various personalities of my department at work, I am definitely the minority. So... it is up to me to meet half way no matter how unimportant or trivial I feel their emotional status is with a project being done. I'm out done, out voted, and because I want the project to run smoothly, I must check my individuality at the door and rely solely on my strengths in the execution of what I'm bringing to the project. Nothing more, nothing less.

Objectivity has always been my super hero power. Compartmentalization is my sidekick. When I lose either one of those superhero powers, I'm working out of ego, anger, and confusion.

A long time ago I read a book by Thich Nhat Hanh, called, "Living Buddha, Living Christ." I urge anyone of any faith to read this book because it's not about religion as much as it is about Understanding.  There's a chapter in the book that speaks to the issue of the Somalian pirates that wreak havoc and destroy lives, rape, kill, and steal the resources of their raided areas. The writer, a Buddhist monk, states that it is easy to hate them and feel empathy for the victims.  However, this is not the way of the Christ nor the Buddha. He then goes on to say how the people get so low that they are basically forced into being a pirate because if they don't, their entire family will be killed, or starve, or their small village will suffer just because of their decision to NOT participate in the pirate's raiding.  None of them want to be in that position, but generation after generation, it becomes, "the way it is," and they have learned to embrace this life style as the only means for survival. Not their own survival but their entire village, their parents, children, grandparents, etc...

The victims of their raid were those areas that held out or where helped with International aid and after the nice white people left, the pirates show up and the fragile security of resources they have managed to gain is lost within months of the missionaries or foreign aid services leaving the area. They may be located only 30 miles from the village that raised the pirate that is now slaughtering them for their goods, but because the area that the raiders live is "beyond fixing," the missionaries never showed up, the foreign aid never came. Then the ones who are left over in the now-raided city try to receive help from the foreign aid personnel that spent a year there.  The aid never comes back. The help never returns. So it's one of two options available at this point... join the pirate raiders or die.  
And on and on it goes until there's nothing left to raid except more developed societies further away. So they go there, and that is the end of them. What was it all for? To survive another day, to ensure the survival of their family or village one more dreadful day until it's over.  So... some of the victims become the raiders, some of the raiders become the victims, and all of them in the end are lost and forgotten.   This sort of objectivity of seemingly black and white circumstances is essential for understanding the larger issue that was caustic of all of it on both sides.  Separation.

"WE are this way, YOU are that way. There is one of you, ten of us and we win. We have this, you don't, we don't care because you are not us." We all die in the end, we all need each other in the interim so that we can die without being alone, hopeless, and broken in spirit. The cycle of "that's just the way I am," must stop if we ever want to live in a world without violence, terrorist groups, elite fascism, corruption, gangs, rape, starvation, suicide, senseless death caused by a lack of a common medication.  You must understand those that you don't understand if you want to change your world because you are just as vulnerable to the status of the people you resist understanding.

Lastly, how this relates to my introspective view of the personality test I had to take at work was profoundly important and yet, so, so, so simple.

The function of the whole was impossible without the four groups of specific personality types. If one of those four groups of people were missing from any level of that organization, the organization would cease to function. If there were only Green people (like me), you'd have a bunch of people analysing everything in their own head, and building an empire that nobody would appreciate when it was completed other than fellow Green people who would merely nod their head in approval and say, "Very clever. I like it. If you'll notice though, in my design I've incorporated what you've done and also added this or that...I'll call you in 6 weeks when it's finished and we can review our inventions and also I have a theory about why light seems to travel through the longitude regions of space on a vector curve..."  

If it were only Blue types, it would be, "I just feel like eating ice cream today and watching movies. Anyone with me? Oh I just love romantic stories.. true love, ahhh, what a wonderful thing. Tell me about your first love.... we can work on this project too, but I really want to just talk to someone today... give me a hug.... Are you okay? Are you mad at me for interrupting? Are you sure? I sense that you are? Are we still close? I'm sorry if I've ever offended you, come on' let's hug it out... "

If there were only Gold types... "I can't find the policy book or instruction manual to this project. Who is in charge here? I say that we just find the policy and procedures book and go from there. I will not factor in anything other than what has been canonized in the rules and regulations. Don't be late tomorrow or we will have to skip lunch and I have low blood sugar so it is imperative that we get the food ordered for the month just to be sure that if someone is late for some reason, then we can still eat while we work. We will wait for our orders from the boss and follow it to the letter no matter if it works or doesn't work, because that is how we do things here."

If there were only Orange types... "I will bet you that I will finish this project before you. Let's race! Who wants to drink on the job? Screw it, let's do it, nobody will know. Even if they do find out, who cares. They will get over it. Oh look, Game of Thrones is on tv. Let's start after the show. Pass me the key to the vending machine. What?! They didn't leave us food and I'm not paying for anything out of my own pocket. They left the key for the machine and there's a KitKat in there with my freakin' name on it. This job is stupid. Ugh. I'm so bored already."

If all of these groups were together, working in unison, the project would be well thought out, inventive, marketed and packaged to the correct client base, and it would be fun to see how fast it could be done and how effective it would be at solving the overarching need/lack.

Each one of these on their own are borderline psychotic at worst and at best a "hot mess."

We must understand that we ARE our "brother's keepers." We are not an island. There are always at minimum, two sides to each argument but at maximum there are infinite sides which all equal "Us."

Go within to know thyself. Uncover what you have been taught by teachers, religion, media, social peer groups, the education system and ask the small voice within to speak louder. What are your guiding ideals as a person? Is it Love, Truth, Knowledge, Unity, Service....? What drives you to be better? Who do you admire as the ultimate expression of what you hold dear? What is it about that person that you value more than other people? Start there. Find that principle. Do the work to understand how that principle works in a real life, day to day navigation through your life.

Then find out what stops you from living that ideal. What principle is "in the way" of that awe inspiring principle you hold so dear? Find the relationship between those two seemingly "conflicting" ideals and then ask yourself how you can resolve that. Maybe you need to redefine the principle for yourself. Maybe you need to understand one more than the other so you know where and why you have it in your mind. Whatever and however you understand yourself better, your life and therefore your world will be better for it. There is nothing more productive that you can do than to understand what drives you on a very deep subconscious level. It will be the key that unlocks your transformation in becoming the soul you were born to be. If we all do this, we change the world into something consciously directed instead of secretly manipulated by the ego of mankind.

Look up, Look in, and don't be stupid.

Written by,
Melodee L. Lenz

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Nikola Tesla's Adjustments For Living, Pt. 1

I remember the first time I discovered the work of Nikola Tesla as an adult. The movie, "The Prestige," came out and the role of Nikola Tesla was played by the late David Bowie. What better way to make someone as mysterious and elusively forgotten in mainstream consciousness, cool and relevant, than by casting David Bowie in this role.  Bravo!

Growing up, my Dad had a machine shop, LAW Engineering. It was run out of an extension of the house we lived in... in rural Texas. My Dad would get huge contracts for the Military Industrial Complex, ex. building the cabinet structures inside the unknown (at that time) Stealth Bomber.  He had these big magnets, about the size of a silver dollar. I would sneak into the shop and gather 4 or 5 of these magnets and I'd sit on the kitchen floor for hours just playing with these magnets. I would see how close I could get one to the opposite magnet before they repelled each other. I suppose, in retrospect, it was sort of a visual learning tool for what I would eventually become fascinated with later on in life.  I was equally obsessed with tornados, radar, sonar, and anything having to do with the stars.  I reckoned that the magnets had some sort of correlation to these things, but I was never allowed to fully dive into the nuts and bolts of this sort of science as a kid.

Instead, my Mom was pushing me in other ways. Performing. I would do little mental experiments with my energy field before I went on stage. I would sort of "power up," before I got in front of the crowd. I would try to connect energetically with every person in the audience. I knew if I made it "personal" then I could win over the crowd and sprinkle some magic sauce over the room.
Unbeknownst to me, at the time this was probably very draining to my physical body.  I was sick all of the time. Not your average "kid sick" kind of issues, but things like pneumonia, fevers exceeding 104 degrees, anemia, repeated bouts of mononucleosis, digestive problems, etc...  I felt like I was in the doctors office weekly, but in reality it was probably about once or twice a month.

I'd bounce back and jump right back into my life of performing and being adventurous.

In the back of my mind, I knew that the bouts of sickness were because of something much more related to spirit than of the body itself. It seemed to me that when I was emotionally spent, I'd have an instant reaction in my body.  My kid brain thought, "there is a connection here."  The magnets I played with showed me the laws of rudimentary physics. When there is a push, there can be a pull or an equidistant pushing depending on polarization. Little did I know that I had figured out Newton's Law on the kitchen floor... using "borrowed" magnets from my Dad's machine shop.

What does this have to do with Nikola Tesla?

There was an interview published toward the end of Tesla's life by a journalist in NYC. A candid interview, and the kind of reporting that you rarely get to see in mainstream media of any kind these days.

You see, back at the turn of the century, there was a wave of "magic sauce" sprinkling across the world. You could say that this wave of new thinking, innovation, and creativity was caustic, rather a result of the base level progress of the human condition due to industry. People had more abundance of food, trade, and the printing press made information easier to acquire and therefore more people were being educated. However, you would be wrong and right all at the same time. The industry was an effect of the cause. The cause being: Consciousness. The consciousness of the world was adapting to it's innate version of  Newton's Law. It was both pulling and pushing creative energy into form and substance.

If you look at who was contributing to society's consciousness at the turn of the century, you have a list of quite possibly the greatest minds in recorded history. I'd also like to mention that science and spirituality were holding hands back then. This is no coincidence. In fact, there are no coincidences in life. These days, in the coined phrase by the great John Anthony West, "Quackademia," we have boxed in educational systems. The physicist isn't probing the great creative works of Plato or probing literature for the hidden treasures in Rumi or William Blake. They say, "That is literary study. It has its place. We are science and academia. We no nothing of poetry, painting, dance or music and it has no place here."

In all fairness, this is changing but it's the old phrase of "it's like pulling teeth,"for this change to rediscover itself without the careers of prominent scientists being questioned and tenured professors losing their pensions.  There is a real fear among these refugees of science "quackademics," to admit that they aren't as evolved in their work as a Serbian Immigrant back in the early 1900's was, i.e. Nikola Tesla.  The real change in consciousness is coming through channels such as this blog site, or alternative opinion newsletters online, the DIY people on Pinterest who are rediscovering how to sew, make jewelry, and even build clean energy devices out of crap laying around in their garage. This is the new revolution of forward thinking. Not CERN, not Nasa, not political carnival barking on CNN or FOX. They are like old dusty armchairs inside of an Ikea showroom... they don't belong and we've rethought more efficient/healthy methods to our "living room." Dig?

What caused this shift into "quackademia," was/is greed, power, and control.

This isn't a conspiracy theory. This is as obvious as the nose on your face if you study the waves of sociological trends and follow the money poop trail.

When creative energy was skipping through the fields with hard nosed science research, you had a big fat baby of technology being birthed at every turn. The railroad was snaking through unknown parts of the country delivering goods, materials, and perspectives to people who were hundreds of miles away. The printing press was distributing more than newspapers and books. It was like Hermes reincarnated - Delivering messages, perspective, and IDEAS to the collective consciousness of humanity.

Sound oddly familiar? It should. The only difference is that our version currently of this rebirth of creative innovation is being ridiculed by the mainstream media instead of being embraced by it. It's not the reporters or news anchors fault. They are doing a job just like you are. You are given the requirements for your job, and they are given the requirements for theirs.  Now are you asking the obvious question? Who is giving the requirements?  That's where the greed, power and control come into play.

Nikola Tesla knew this ol' hat better than anyone. Despite his hundreds upon hundreds of innovative inventions (most of which are still in a vault somewhere or being used by secret black budget projects) Tesla was not interested in money.  He was quoted as saying at the end of his life to this journalist who I spoke of earlier in this blog...

"I am a defeated man. I just wanted to illuminate the whole Earth."  -Nikola Tesla

Nikola had created free energy on a level that we can barely fathom today and one that borders on the magical side of things to someone who isn't a student of the laws of energy and ancient mysticism.

Tesla was using a radio telescoping device he created to speak to the "music of the spheres." 
Only recently, as in 2016, NASA transmitted the sounds of certain planetary spheres to the general public as though this was the most innovative new discovery of modern human existence. The only part of their discovery that was "new" is the fact that we can hear it on our smart phones. That's it.
All of the geniuses of the turn of the century were like no bullshit Chicken Little's. "The sky really is falling..."  Nobody in our "progressive culture" believed these chickens 100 years ago, but if an alphabet soup organization like NASA, CIA, NSA, FBI, CERN... if they say it then we all perk up.

So how does this type of mentality change in the masses of human consciousness more rapidly?

It must begin with the individual and then as the great Edgar Cayce, while in a deep state of meditation, said:

  "Know thyself to be thyself, and still One with Creation."
 -Edgar Cayce 
"The Ideals Workbook," courtesy of the A.R.E., Virginia Beach, VA.

Nikola Tesla gave a step by step process that he went through in his life to embody that knowing of thyself, whilst knowing the Oneness of All.

Nikola Tesla's Adjustments For Living

1. High Awareness of Mission/Purpose
"A high awareness of mission or purpose. This does exist in the early days of childhood, even dimly."

Explanation: Tesla told the journalist that when he was a boy he enjoyed electricity, the thunder, lightning. These things excited him and he claimed that these sparks of excitement we all experience as children are to be recalled and remembered as a pure message of our mission here. As in, but not limited to, our innate gifts that could drive our fullness of development.  
Edgar Cayce explained this as our true self/Ideals. Carl Jung, the renowned psychologist claimed that we all have these indicator moments in our childhood that will propel our own 'hero journey' into living. If we all can get clear on even 1% of our true self's excitement and try to honor it bit by bit, the entire collective consciousness or energy of "the people" would transform the planet. 

2. Determination or Activating of the Will
"All that I might, I finish." 

Explanation:  Be like the little engine that could... and did. Activation of our will power is essential to the infusion of our vital energy as beings. It is a juggernaut that gains momentum and breaks barriers and limitations. The power is equal in both positive and negative ways. Nobody can say that Adolf Hitler didn't have will power, you know? However, with the construct or framework of the surrounding ideals of self that are aligned with creative energy, we will not tread on the same path as Mr. Hitler. Determination is also silent and still like Mahatma Ghandi facing the British troops and sitting still in peaceful resistance. This was a force much greater than anything that Stalin or Hitler could sustain. By knowing our true self's ideals, we can use this Determination or Will for positive momentum that begins with Self but encompasses Other Selves.  

3. Guidance in Spiritual Energies and Purification of Needs
"Write down that Mr. Tesla enjoyed each day and night and was a happy man." 

Explanation:  Tesla was speaking here about the spiritual and vital energies of labor. This harkens back to King Solomon's personal writing in Ecclesiastes when he had come to the later part of his life and was going through a sort of mid-life/end of life crisis of self. He wondered why anything was anything. What did it mean? He had all that anyone could hope or wish for yet he was broken and miserable in spirit.  By the end of Ecclesiastes, Solomon has an epiphany and realizes that point of life is to enjoy ones work, give thanks, show love to others, and find happiness in each moment no matter how difficult it may seem to be.   Nikola Tesla said that the third adjustment of living was to find joy in the labor one must endure to find completion of "one's mission." Understanding and thereby purifying the human needs so that they are uplifted and reformed by the Will and by the guidance of spiritual energies.  He said, "I have not lost anything, I have only gained." We falsely assume that the monks of Nepal are "going without" and therefore it must be very difficult to choose that life. They would argue that it must be difficult to choose our life. Surrounded by 'wants' that parade around in the costume of 'needs.' How to discern? We can discern by the purification of these needs. Choosing to feed the spirit rather than the body, first by the awareness of it, second by the will, and thirdly the purification of needs, not wants. 

4. Adjust the Physical Body With A Work
"Know your body because it is a perfect machine for your individual spirit." 

Explanation:  Nikola Tesla was known to only sleep a couple of hours a day, eat sparsely and rarely, and routinely subjected himself to his own inventions. There is a famous picture of him sitting in a metal chair in the center of his famous Tesla Coil. Arms and branches of electricity were sprawling out all around him and he was calmly writing in his journal, peaceful as a Hindu cow.  

This mastery of knowing Self was what enabled him to not endure these seemingly torturous devices, but to benefit from them. He had become good friends with the infamous Mark Twain, accrediting Mr. Twain with healing him as a child by the immersion of his stories in books like, "Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn."  Twain took an interest in Nikola's work, being a student himself of the esoteric principles of energy, and made a habit of visiting Tesla's laboratory whenever he readily could find the time.  On one occasion, just to illuminate the Fourth principle of Adjustment for Living, Nikola Tesla had Mr. Twain try out a machine that used various frequencies and vibrations to stimulate the brain's joy receptors. 

Tesla warned Mr. Twain that his body was not as attuned to the frequencies as his own body was, and to only subject himself to the device for a brief amount of time. Mark Twain was bullheaded and in true fashion of his noted personality flaws, he told Nikola to tune the device to whatever level Nikola used and to "stop messing about, just do it." Tesla, not wanting to mix words with Twain, said, "sure thing." 

The result according to Tesla to the journalist I am referencing in this blog was this,  "I warned him. He stayed longer and then had to hold his pants up, like a rocket he dashed to a certain room(bathroom) and I must say, it was diabolically funny."  Although this explanation seems lengthy, and it is, I feel it is one of the most pertinent to our current society. We are bombarded with messages and advice of the dietary nature. From low carb diets to raw vegan regimes, we are constantly confused about our physical body's needs. Know what your body responds to, how it is tuned, what seems to resonate with it instead of what repels it or damages it. You will find out regardless, but it should be something that is actively sought out so that the SPIRIT can be housed in the "perfect machine." I will relate a personal example. I have several people in my life that thrive on the low carb meat eating diet. They've lost weight, have energy, and feel great. They also require 8-10 hours of sleep and typically when they sleep, there is no waking them up. 

I experimented for several months, years ago,  with the same diet plan that these people were doing.  I gained 40 pounds, had physical pain in my back and legs, and had NO energy at all for anything. I knew that my body didn't function or house my spirit in an ideal way by doing that type of nutrition plan. I went back to eating sprouted grains, peanut butter, fruit, beans, and black coffee and always having dessert. I dropped all the pounds I had gained, had energy again, and felt more in tune with the mind/body/spirit connection.  The same goes for physical activity. What works for some, seems to destroy others. Know this. The mass fads or trends are not attuned for the individual. 

This will take some introspection and experimentation but the body will always respond either way. Again, take into consideration more than just the body. This is also about the spirit, mostly about the spirit. If your "purpose/ideal" isn't in alignment with the body, you will be like the magnets I played with on the kitchen floor, i.e. repelling and pushing away the other. When they snapped together, the result was just a bigger magnet, more powerful. This is good visualization for anyone who wants to tune up the body/mind/spirit for it's ultimate wholeness. 

5. Memory
"All that you've seen, heard, or learned accompanies you in the form of light particles."

Explanation: Memory was explained by Nikola Tesla as being one of the Nine principles of Adjustments for Living. He was quick to note that he was not speaking about memory as in the mundane day to day memorizing of grocery lists, schedules, or directions to your kid's daycare. He was speaking about uppercase Memory. Some could call this Intuitive Memory. He said, "not remembering but picking what is required at any given moment for knowledge and wisdom is all around us. It is for consuming. All that you've seen, heard, or learned accompanies you in the form of light particles. These particles are obedient and faithful to us."  He would often say that when he was hung up on a problem with an invention, he would take a nap and consciously ask his mind to solve the problem. Invariably he would wake from a nap and have the solution or even fully formed blueprints of a new invention that would supersede the previous one. We have a falsehood in our current society regarding this 'hall of records' that is invisible and only accessible to us in the dream or meditation states. We don't trust this because it isn't material. It is only etherial. Yet, it is Einstein who said, "All thoughts are matter." What is etherial becomes material if we choose to utilize this. This fifth Adjustment for Living comes as no surprise to anyone who navigates through life going against the 'status quo.' My biggest personal peeve is being called, "clever." I suppose I loathe that term because it reminds me of cats... fickle, selfish, and rude most of the time.  I think this term "clever" is lobbed out at those of us who are doing this Fifth Adjustment of Living. We are navigating through life, picking the particles of light that surround us, and using them as the classic "Hansel and Gretel breadcrumb trail."  Some may call it synchrony but that implies coincidence, and random actions resulting in a discernible orderly and applicable modality.  Even if that were the case, one must think about this as also being as Einstein called it, "spooky action." He called certain mysterious phenomenon, "spooky action physics," because, well, for one, he had a sense of humor. Secondly, because it was invisible and yet resulted in the visible. This is the true nature of all living things. It begins in the invisible and becomes the material. 

6. Adaptation to Disease or Dis-Ease
"purification of the Vital Force within sometimes requires the body to suffer...The source of most disease is of the spirit." 

Explanation:  We don't enjoy hearing that most of disease or illness comes from the maladjusted body to the needs of the soul. For some reason, we'd like to have a pill or treatment that we can  hold in our hands that will heal the disease that afflicts us. If you go within and consider this, wouldn't it be much more effective to sort out where the resistance of our true Self is stemming from instead of spending a  fortune on drugs that create a domino effect of chaos in our bodies? No. We much prefer the veil to hide the boogeyman in the mirror. Nobody wants to believe that they are the cause of their busted body. What horror it is to find out that the true self is trying to teach you about vanity by manifesting horrendous acne! Or having tremendous fertility issues is caused by the divine Self trying to say, "This is not what will save your marriage or This is not what you need right now, you need to work with animals or paint or write that book you have in the back of your head... "  When we are not in alignment with our Higher Ideals, we will have consequences and due to the nature of how we are existing on earth, those repercussions are often in the material/our body. This is not the exception, this is the rule.  Nikola Tesla related a story that I found to be quite beautiful and personal. 
"As a child student, I got sick with Cholera which was raging in the region of Lika, Serbia. I was cured instantaneously when my father finally said I was allowed to study technology, which was my life, my heart. " 

7. Control of Vital Energy over Feelings
"of myself, I created a thoughtful and spiritual machine..." 

Explanation:  Conscious, deliberate control, mastery over the primal forces and reactionary responses to stimulus or lack of. This one should be obvious but as I watch the political landscape of our "modern" world, I am seeing more and more how this seventh principle is the most overlooked. How many of you have been snapped at by someone who was "having a bad day." Everyone? How many of you have thought, "what does that have to do with me? I didn't do anything to you!" I remember growing up and even now, when someone was being moody or sulking around, people would typically say these two crass statements: "So and so just needs to get laid." Or "So and so is on the rag." I always felt/feel like I'm fully alien when I hear those two things. I never understood why those were viable excuses for bad behavior. To me, and I'm sure to many of you, it felt like something that someone said because they heard it in a movie somewhere. Sadly, the older I got, the more I realized that people were really controlled by their primal nature. 

They don't have to be, but they have been conditioned to think that it's perfectly acceptable to be a moody sulking jerk because someone didn't have sex with them. It's a hilarious conundrum because by being a moody sulking a-hole, nobody will! Moving past that example...the reactionary cycle of feelings is twofold. It is helpful as well as being a hindrance of personal growth/sociological evolution.  

In our society, we have embraced the outbursts of reactionary individuals and labeled it as strength or worse- leadership. It is neither. If we consider the Other Selves and get out of our crazy bubble for a moment, we will see that what we react to should be carefully sifted and sorted. There are things we should have strong reactions about, but in doing so, we still must carry the framework of our other Higher Ideals. Tesla knew this better than most. The unfair treatment he received in  his life when he should've received prizes was pathological. His life's work was stolen by men in suits, who wanted nothing but power and greed. He died penniless at a hotel in New York City after inventing thousands of things that he wanted to GIVE the world FREE of Charge. We would be living in a Star Trek world, free of disease, pollution, and corruption if the elite financiers/war mongering profiteers had developed a Higher Ideal.  Control over the VITAL energy related to feelings means to preemptively initiate damage control before there is damage to yourself and others. 

8. Service To Others
"Do everything, at any day, at any moment, If possible to not forget who we are and why we are on the Earth." 

Explanation: Does it need one? We are not alone. We share our air, water, and earth with Other Selves. Nikola Tesla said that the music of life, or frequencies of light were present in everything from the stone to the thunder. All being varied forms of conscious and sentient life. This sounds more like the Dalai Llama or Christ than it does a physicist, right? We have separated too much. We have separated thoughts from Inspired thought, poetry from physics, art from mathematics, and we are disconnected from love of Other Selves because of this. I say "Other Selves" because that is what we are together. The flame of the candle can light millions of wicks, yet it is the same flame. We know this. 

9. Play
"I have so loved to play with electricity! I always cringe when I hear the myth of Greek that stole fire. A terrible story...Did Zeus not have enough lightning and thunder and was damaged by one favor? To me, seriousness reduces life. Write this in your journals...He dared to take upon himself the prerogatives of Indri, Zeus and Peron. Imagine one of these gods in a black evening suit, with bowler hat and wearing white cotton gloves preparing feats of lightning, fires, and earthquakes to the New York City elite! (he laughs)."

Journalist comments: Readers love the humor of our paper. But you confuse me stating that at your findings, which have immense benefits for all people, you are representing a game? Many will frown on this I'm afraid Mr. Tesla. 

Tesla: Dear Mr. Smith, the trouble is that people are too serious. If they were not, they would be happier and much longer lived. But let's get back to what will not make the newspaper readers frown. 

Journalist: They want to hear what your philosophy is. 

Tesla: Life is a rhythm that must be comprehended. I feel the rhythm and direct on it and pamper it. Everything that lives is related to a deep and wonderful relationship. Man and the stars, amoebas and the sun, the heart and the circulation of an infinite number of world. These ties are unbreakable. They can be tamed and begin to create new and different relationships in the world. This does NOT violate the old. 

Journalist: Mr. Tesla, you are biased toward Electricity. 

Tesla: Electricity I am. Or, if you wish, I am the electricity in the human form. You are the Electricity too Mr. Smith, but you do not realize it. 

Sunday, May 21, 2017

Sesame Street Lied To Me

I'm not sure what is happening in the mainstream news media but I'm treating it like the mentally ill psychotic neighbor that people avoid making eye contact with when they check the mailbox. Oh, you don't have one of those? Yeah you do. Everyone does. That's the scary part.

Do you ever catch yourself doing that thing where you disassociate from your surroundings and just kind of look at everything and think, "I gotta get out of here." If you are reading MY blog, this has happened to you. If you are reading a blog about the going's on of "The Bachelor," you have no idea what I'm talking about.

This feeling has happened to me countless times. I'd wager at least 100,000 times I've thought, "oh my GAWD this is real. I gotta find a way out of this place."

Quick/not quick story...

Do you remember your first memory? I do. I remember looking down at myself before I could talk and thinking, "Are you kidding me? I'm a human? A girl too? No! Why can't I fly?!! I take it back, I take it back. I don't want to do this mission. You guys were right, this isn't going to be easy at all."

The other memory I have was standing at the top of the stairs and seeing my Grandmother's sister down below. She had come to visit us from San Fran. I remember my Grandma saying, "Melodee Lei, you better be careful. Wait there. I'm going to come up and bring you down."  I looked at her and thought, "Um... I'm pretty sure I can fly." Nope. Crash. Boom. Bang.  Next thing I know, my Grandmother had convinced my Mom that we needed to move out of that house before I, "kill myself on those stairs."

I remember watching television shows like "Sesame Street," and thinking, "okay, I need to learn how to do things in this body." The episode was the famous one where the little African American girl is in Brooklyn or wherever, and she had a grocery list that her mother gave her to fetch certain items from the store down the block. (side note: this was perfectly normal in the 1970's and 80's)
The little girl made a rhythmic kind of mantra as she walked to the store, "A loaf of bread, eggs, and a jug of milk." (repeat with some drums in the back)

The kid gets to the crosswalk and looks both ways and then crosses the street... Resumes her chant of the grocery list and arrives at the store to purchase the items on the list.

In retrospect, I'm wondering why she spoke the list if she had it in her hand the whole time? I don't know. These are questions for scholars, not me.


There was a corner store close to my Grandma's house which was kind of the Barrio area of Dallas County. The store was next to the laundry mat where my Grandmother washed clothes. I loved that place for some reason. Weird.  I digress...

One day my Grandmother went to pick up one of her many grandkids from school or to take my cousin to work which was just about a mile away. I was about 4 years oldish. I was VERY small for my age. I looked like a 2  year old when I was 4.

I watched the episode of Sesame Street I mentioned above. I consciously thought, "okay, let's try this out. Can't be hard. I have some money in my bag, I'll go to the store and buy those things." (I had a fist full of pennies in my Snoopy coin purse)

I walked outside and headed to 5th Street. (a major thoroughfare) Looked both ways. Clear. Proceed.

Repeating the mantra, "Eggs, bread, a jug of milk," I can remember being very impressed with myself.  Cars were passing me and looking concerned. I made it all the way to the store. NOT the store by the house, but a store that was at least 3 streets over. I crossed A LOT of streets. I remember looking up and seeing my cousin's boyfriend on his motorcycle. He stopped and said, "Melodee? What are you doing? Your Grandmother is going to have a heart attack! I'm taking you home."

I was like, "I'm getting a jug of milk, eggs, and a loaf of bread." He completely ignored me and just frantically put me on his MOTORCYCLE and took me home. My entire family was out on the lawn FREAKING OUT. Luckily my Dad wasn't there because I wouldn't be alive to tell the tale.

My Grandmother never hit anyone, but that day... I was smacked pretty hard. I had no idea what I had done wrong. I remember thinking, "if they let kids watch something that demonstrates going to the store alone, then there's a bigger problem with the society I'm living in."

I really thought that. I couldn't say that in English but I thought that in my mind and couldn't effectively communicate it. All I could say really was, "Sesame Street did it," and "I helping with milk, bread and egg store."

This was HIGHLY upsetting to everyone.

It was the first feeling of failure I had in my life. Little did I know that similar thoughts would happen for the next 34 years.

So... the point of this blog, if there is one, which there rarely is...

This human thing is not for the weak. I think the term, "I'm only human," might be the most honest statement ever made in history. We all had clarity when we were kids. All of us.
Even the person who is watching, "The Bachelor," and is deeply concerned with the outcome... that person was once a super tuned-in soul.

So where did we go wrong?

I believe we came into this world very clear and then the water became muddied and murky and slightly stinky. It's mixed messages, don't do this, do that, be this way, think like I think, that's not real, that's real... that's silly, that's acceptable.  It's no wonder kids hate school. It is completely counter to the natural learning process.

At the age of 5, ( or sometimes younger if you are one of those over achiever kids that was pushed academically by your lunatic parents) you are told to forgo anything you think you know, and accept what "WE" know.

This is why everyone is so bat shit crazy deep down.  I can only imagine if other civilizations in outer space are observing this tiny blue planet, how they must scratch their heads in total amazement.  I've often thought of these magnificent people that have come into our civilization out of seemingly nowhere, (ex. Christ, Nikola Tesla, Einstein, Buddha, Mohammed, Mother Theresa, Elijah, Moses, MLKjr., Gandhi) were sent because it was just flat out impossible for the Creator Realm and other Solar system civilizations to know how to help?

Humor me...

Imagine an infinitely huge network of extremely loving and high intelligence cultures in the universe calling one another on their space phones and saying,

"So... the Earth thing... crazy huh? I'm not sure why God is so stuck on that place? I mean, we did alright? What's their flippin' problem? No, it kind of pisses me off too. I mean, God is all obsessed over helping them, but what did we get? I know, I know Steven, I'm being really negative, I know... it's these Earth stories... I'm reading the reports and it's just unbelievable. I'm not sure I want to do that mission anymore. What if I get stuck there? I mean, Steven.. can you imagine being stuck there? 

Oh my God. I know...horrible. Well, I've got a bunch of really great stuff I'm bringing down there but the Big Guy is telling me that I have to forget what I know and truly embrace being a human.... I'm like, God, "what is all the training for if I just have to forget it and learn how to poop or whatever... it sounds kind of sketchy to me... 

well, if the Big Guy ordered it, I guess He knows what's up.... I don't know Steven. Pray for me. M'kay... bye. Oh, and make sure to feed my Guinea pig while I'm gone. Do they have Guinea pigs there? Oh no way... Who left one there? Never mind... I don't want to know. Okay I'll see you on the other side." 

And then your born and you scream, crap all over the place, and realize you are STARVING.
And so it begins.

When it's over, and you've mashed enough transient crap into your mind, you return for debriefing.

And that might go something like this....

"Welcome back! So, let's hear all about it. What did you find out?" 

And your like vomiting and crying... barely able to speak... 

"Oh God. No, really God... I need to speak to God. Steven, piss off dude, I have to talk to the Big Guy. Seriously. You. Have. No. Idea!" 

"I don't know what I learned because it was just so confusing the whole time. They have things called Allergies. Their biological organic beings attack their breathing apparatus... They have this green paper stuff that you get things with- instead of just getting what you need- which is what Everyone needs... but you have to do something you really hate doing for like... oh my God... for like- Years! 

And and and... then you finally get a few things that you thought you needed, only to find out that you didn't need them at all...They lie all the time. 

They lie about what they like, what they don't like, and even who they are? But you can't really remember what you are, it's freakin weird man... Anyway... then you love other people and their contract ends super fast and you cry and feel like your heart organ is going to explode with grief... Then for some stupid reason you wake up and continue living?

 Animals that are your friends are contracted for like hardly any time at all... they leave... and then you cry more and then you want to end your contract but you go back to sleep, wake up and continue living again? It's so bizarre. It's like running into a fire over and over again because you need warmth but you know it will kill you, but you REALLY hate to be cold. 

It's so hard. Listen to me.... listen.... they need help. 

They are starting to figure out that it shouldn't be the way it is there, and some of them are really trying to make a difference but there are these horrible evil people that wear suits or carry weapons n' stuff, and those people are holding everyone hostage because they are contracted by the Big Guy's super shitty ex-best friend. 

These humans are totally caught in the middle of that whole thing!  They do have really great books there, beautiful art and this thing called Jazz... it would blow your mind. Did you know you can't fly? No. You can't. I mean, you can, but it's like in this weird metallic clunky thing that is super slow, horrible design, just stupid frankly. Look, we gotta help them.

 Here's what Steven, I saw some of OUR craft in the sky and you know what the suits do? You won't believe it. They tell the humans that they are crazy if they talk about what they actually saw! I know. I know. But here's the thing Steven, the humans actually do what they are told?  They are totally ready to break out of there but there are like a handful of these evil assholes that are tricking them all into thinking there's nothing else out there. I know it's ridiculous but I'm just telling you what I know...

What do you mean do I want to go back for another mission? Are you crazy? Look, I don't know... I'll think about it. Okay fine. Okay, okay, okay... yeah, I guess I will. But this time, I'm going to make sure I remember some things so that I don't completely lose my mind. Hey... will you guys check in with me once in a while through the Dream Machine? Cool. Hey... pull me out if it looks like I might get stuck there." 

....then you watch Sesame Street and go to the store to buy a loaf of bread, some eggs and a jug of milk.

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Who's Ready For A Good Ol' Catastrophe?

Being an avid student of anything ancient, hard to understand, or misinterpreted in the modern human experience, one thing holds true...

We are due for an asswhoopin'.

In the Hopi, Mayan, Sumerian, and Egyptian sacred knowledge, the earth goes through a big fat spankin' from the universe every 26,000 years. I hear the news reports on how horrible everything is, how big stupid idiots running world have their finger on the trigger, and how all of us are just being forced to accept that this is our reality. We don't. In fact, I think we aren't accepting this as our paradigm anymore. Sure, some are, but those people are miserable and full of self-loathing and shame.

How many people do you know that  have officially lost their mind? Maybe not "officially," as in the cliche "white padded van carry-off," scenario, but you know they aren't, "good ol' Jim from work," anymore.

It's scary, right? I've had this experience with more than a few people. I did the classic self-diagnosis of  "maybe I'm the crazy one.. and they are how they've always been?"

Being analytical to a fault, I covered this topic from every angle I could think of before labeling it with the giant red, "OVER THEM," stamp.

What is causing this polarization in people? Has it always been there and we are just finally seeing it for the first time? Or is it something more...

It's something more. Did you know that the Schumann Resonance of the Earth has changed? Don't know what that is? I'll tell you.

Everything has a frequency. All of life has an electromagnetic frequency to it, our "electron identification stamp" so to speak. The Earth itself has a signature of EMF. It has always been a steady 7.83hz.  This frequency is kind of like Mother Earth's heartbeat. It's been a healthy 7.83hz and spikes occasionally when there are earthquakes several miles in depth, or during Coronal Mass Ejection waves hitting earth from a Sun spot/solar storm.

The highest it  has ever peaked was 33.3hz and it didn't stay that way for very long- minutes at most.

It all changed in January of 2017, yeah, this year.

I know, I know, there are jokes already forming in my mind too. However, let's put that aside for just a moment and look at the facts. And there are FACTS.

The Shumann Resonance spiked to 90hz in January of 2017 and hasn't dropped below 50hz since then. That is like every subwoofer at South by Southwest being turned to the max volume and all of our cell phones giving feedback interference through them for 5 months. Would you lose your mind? Yup. However, it's not quite that simple and that model doesn't truly explain why this 90hz thing is significant.

Nikola Tesla stated that "if you want know the secrets of the universe, think in terms of frequency and vibration." 

The SECRETS of the universe. Catch that? To me, that implies that this abrupt shift in the Earth's "heartbeat" or frequency, is letting us all "in on it's little secret"....

Things are changing outside of our little human hands, and yet, probably because of our NOT so little human influence. This tiny blue speck of a planet is doing cardio at the gym, and we are along for the ride... like fleas on the back of a dog.

Some of us are operating at a higher frequency, so this change isn't affecting us in a negative way.
How do I know this? I'll prove it.

The Maharishi Effect. This was an experiment that was done in the 1960's, and has been repeated many times over in recent years. The principal is "quantum entanglement."
Or if you prefer, "group consciousness," "directed prayer," or focused meditation.

The experiment was astounding. The objective was/is to focus one's intent, positively, to stop violent attacks, create peace, love, and other hippy ideals through a focused, directed, prayer/meditation for a set amount of time, at the exact day/time with a large mass of people.

Did it work?

 It was hard to negate because many police departments across the world had huge shifts in their violent crime statistics beginning on the exact day when the focused meditation experiment took place.

I'm not trying to sell you on this, but the reports and research is out there and you can read it for yourself.  You will also find a massive amount of the scientific naysayer community who will poo-poo anything that isn't within their very small minded set of "nothing that is unexplainable is real," principles.

For every great & FREE project like Maharishi's TM experiment, there are double the haters/quadruple the naysayers. They want to believe we are all just meat suits that will die, nothing is magical, nothing is extraordinary, and if you believe anything is bigger than their scientific journals of controlled academia...well, then you are just uneducated hilljacks.

Similar to Maharishi's experiment, we have the brilliant Japanese Alternative Medicine Doctor named, Dr. Masaru Emoto.  Emoto  photographed how human consciousness affected the water molecule. You may have seen his work in the documentary, "What the Bleep Do We Know."
(Clearly, nothing. We know nothing. We have lost our way, our mind, and we have forgotten how we are energetic beings having a physical experience. We are interconnected to everyone, everything, and all that is seen or unseen. )

Dr. Emoto used words like "love, happiness, joy, kindness," directed through water molecules and focused positive sound waves like children laughing, birds singing, etc..

He also did the opposite and used words like, "hatred, war, death, pain, fear," and played sounds of crying, agony, audio clips from horrible atrocities world wide...

The result? The water that was played the negative sounds was distorted to the point that it was literally undrinkable. The molecules had been affected so negatively by human consciousness, it was contaminated.

He didn't stop there. He went to the extreme end of this experiment by just meditating focused thoughts of both positive and negative ideas at the water. Same result.

The water subjected to the positive directed human consciousness... You'll have to see for yourself. It is remarkable what happened. The water crystalized, purified, and each molecule under the microscope was in various patterns of perfect symmetry... much like a snowflake or the facets of a diamond. Not only was the water purified, but the frequency of the water was raised. The Ph factor was altered and it became alkaline, and similar/yet higher quality than the Artisan Springs that are touted as being the best drinking water in the world.

If you get a chance to look up any of this stuff, please do.

What is my point in listing examples like I did above?

It should be obvious.

We have power. Loads of it.

Our ability to focus on something and bring it into a positive focus or a fear based one is our "creative power." We create/we destroy. The animals of the world do not possess this power- though they are conscious and sentient beings.

They do not have the co-creative consciousness that humans do. They have instinct, genetic patterns, and survival mechanisms that are built in to the "hardwiring."  When do they go against this hardwiring?

When human consciousness has domesticated them into being more Human! We have the ability to change a completely instinctual sentient being just by giving our attention, love, and focus and care to it.

Here's the question... Are we the cause of Earth's frequency change? Or is Earth deciding to raise the frequency of her heartbeat in hopes that we will too?

Either way, it is an inevitable result of the higher frequency people getting more  happy, inspired, creative, and energetic to suit their vibration/frequency... and the lower vibrational energy folks are feeling like it's "too hot in the kitchen" and are scrambling in fight or flight panic mode.

They have itchy trigger fingers, and are set off in a tailspin of hatred at the first smell of anything that isn't matching their energy.  Thus, you have the "is so-and-so crazy now?"  Sadly, they might be GOING a bit nuts, but it is because their lower frequency/energy field cannot exist in the world anymore.

Sure it feels like there are more of them than there are of the "high vibe guys," but that simply isn't true. Here's how I know this... we aren't on fire. There is still a world we are standing on. There isn't nuclear fallout raining down on every country with a cross wind. Children are still laughing outside. Birds are singing on my back porch. Squirrels are happily scampering around and forgetting where they buried their acorns.

The low frequency panicked and flailing folks are trying their hardest to make their ecosystem suit their frequency and energetic field by creating war, fear in the media, and trying to spout off their poisonous rhetoric on every public platform they can get their hands on so that they can continue to exist in this world. They can't. This world is "working' out and getting' bikini ready" right now and ain't nothin' stopping her from being all She has wanted to be for eons.  Let's let her shine for once.

It's time for history to NOT repeat itself. We have had thousands of years to get our act together, so I think it's time to just get on the world's stage and stand in the spotlight and give our gifts to the "audience" because that is WHO we are, WHAT we are, and if you don't want to see how this "plays out" then don't block the ticket window.

Friday, October 7, 2016

Not An Excuse-Team Psychosis

I've never fully understood the mania around sports. In my house growing up, if the Cowboys lost a game, the family dynamic turned sour, even aggressive. 

The last two days I've spent sitting on the highway behind pile up accidents and the local radio broadcasts ranting about baseball games and projections of wins/losses of future's all so stupid that I have to publically and unapologetically state that I officially DO NOT CARE about your bad mood over a frivolous sports team's loss. 

Look, I'm sorry you wore your team's colors to work and thought anyone would be more understanding when you stomp around acting like a 6 year old when he's told he has to stop playing Xbox and eat dinner. 

It's no excuse. It's not. I'm not sorry. I don't care. Your rage is stupid. Dare I say, your rage is feigned. It's a dumb display of passion for something that will not impact the world, save a life, stop murders, create peace and kindness .... It does nothing but separate humanity further. 

Yeah I said it. 

I have nothing against athleticism, sport, or enjoying the activity of watching or playing sports. 

What I'm sick of is the self-important emotional outbursts of power fans. Behavior of people who let the outcome of a game, a GAME- ruin their day. 

When I inuit that you are no longer "rational and are behaving erratically," therefore, you are no longer emotionally safe to be around..Well, your stupid fandom has gone too far. 

Fist fights in the parking lots if NFL games over team loyalty?! Are you kidding? 

Drunken road rage that almost kills an entire family on their way to the fair because some testerone filled jack ass had to drive how HE wanted his outfielder to run in the game they just lost.... 

Get a grip people. 

If these sports fanatics had as much passion for helping others as they do for throwing a ball around, we would have no more problems! 

I wish I could really give specific examples of what happened that spawned this blog, but I can't without risk of exposing far more than I legally can. 

We place far too much value in sports teams. Emotional value, monetary value, even spiritual value.

Yet, if a gathering of 25,000 people could get together and focus their mind's on: Loving what has lost hope, healing broken hearts, peace and healing for all... 

The collective consciousness or quantum entanglement would bring those things about with the speed of Angels. 

If just one Sunday crowd watching the Cowboys game were to think loving thoughts toward those suffering with war, being homeless due to weather catastrophes, children dying in our own country due to lack of food or proper hygiene, veterans getting zero treatment for permanent conditions resulting from the horrors of battle, animals getting abused by violent ignorant losers... 
Listen Folks. Listen good n' plenty to my following statement... 

One solitary Sunday crowd of "passionate" sports fans directing 10 minutes of energy, collectively, toward the loving thoughts and prayers to all I listed above, would single handedly change the vibrational energy of the entire planet! 

I'm not exaggerating. It's been scientifically proven with groups of 40, 50, 200, and 1000 people meditating on clean water for a minimal time duration that the bacterial content of the water,  went from toxic to drinkable within 2 hours. How? 

"To understand how everything in the universe works, think in terms of Frequency and Vibration." 
-Nikola Tesla 

If you don't know who he is, I suggest Googling his 45,000 pages of patents that have been suppressed from the public for 100 years. You have iPhones, X-Ray, Generators, Electrical outlets, wind turbines, solar energy panels, kinetic self-charging devices, and a million other MAJOR inventions. We have these  because of someone who wanted to create FREE energy for humankind so we weren't enslaved by our own inefficient energy consumption. He knew the universe in its entirety, functioned(positively or negatively)   on frequency and vibration. 

Negative action, thoughts, and words have a literal and documented lower vibrational frequency or hertz. The word "love," just saying it outloud produces a higher vibrational sound wave/frequency that cleanses bacteria in plant test subjects. 

Negative words, disharmonic melodies, screaming, crying, fear, all produce frequencies that in some studies killed plants! 

Imagine what they can do in large unruly groups all directed at something?  The ripple effect of negative outbursts IS Newton's Law being played out in real life. Real life! Not just the clever metal ball toy you get from novelty stores.  (The one where you pull one ball  back and it pops the other ball on the opposite side?) Yeah. 

This is Newtons Law: 
 "Every action creates an equal or opposite reaction." 

Next time you or your friends want to be nasty brooding semi-aggressive assholes because "your team" metaphorically or literally, "dropped the ball," remember the energy that you explain as "passion" could be directed into transformative world changing progress on a quantum level. 

Be it a rage-filled 3 car pile up on the highway which killed a family of four, or creating miracles of peace that ripple through the vibrational sea of our world...
It is your choice, but either way you aren't alone in that choice. 

There will always be an equal or opposite reaction. 

It's the physics of emotion, then motion. 

While you bang your fists, stomp around, drink heavily, spin out in your oversized stupid truck, yell at someone because they wear a color that isn't "your team," just remember that those of us who are thinking about how to lift up humanity in whatever way we can... We think you should be "benched." 

Mic drop. Guitar smash. Lotus position. Om... 

Sunday, July 24, 2016

What Is Happening!

Many people are feeling the effects of the chaos that is perpetually happening in the world. From the mass shootings, riots, rogue factions creating fear, disinformation of information, it's all seeming like too much to mentally process.

Have you asked yourself in your quiet moments if this all seems kind of unreal?
Something feels off, no doubt about it.

I'd like to pose a question/theory about why it seems so horrible right now. Roll with me here...

When a disease is being eradicated, knows it's being "dealt with," it holds on for dear life, your life. The body knows it is something that shouldn't be there, but oftentimes, the virus or disease will mask itself, hide, or worsen something else that was dormant in the body for years.

I believe the micro always represents the Macro, or as the ancient Egyptians believed, "as above, so below."

We  have a very real, very intense battle going on right now between good and evil, enlightenment and ignorance, and love vs. fear.  Why didn't I say Love vs. Hate? I didn't use the word hate, because "hatred" isn't what the core issue is here. The root of hatred is and always has been- Fear.

We destroy what we don't understand. We dissect and dismantle what we want to know more about, but fear knowing when the deconstructed 'thing' is active or alive. It's too close to us when it's moving about, alert, aware, or behaving in its natural habitat. We must render it inactive before we take it apart to see all of it's moving parts.

This is human nature, or so we  have been programmed to believe.

I don't believe this.

When an athlete conditions himself/herself for a big competition, they build to the peak level of performance. They don't start off by blowing out their body in a long distance run followed by a 7 hour weight lifting session. They begin by slowly introducing new habits, new routines, and gradually add or level up their training at a very methodically planned out pace.

 In other words, a good conditioning program is one that begins slowly and knows the long-game results of each incremental step to perfection of the "win."

Why am I talking about conditioning in athletes?
Conditioning is one of the oldest psychological techniques in recorded history. The Roman's wouldn't barge into a place and just massacre everyone the first day of the siege. They did something far more sinister.

They would build their camps within eye-shot of the soon-to-be sieged area. They had a "long game" approach to take over the city. The camps weren't shoddy tents or cheaply built sleeping arrangements either. They were as elaborate as a temporary structure could be.

Most of these siege camps had running water, plumbing, and resources that sustained the Roman army for months, even years!

The local people who could see the construction of these camps would watch in fear. Eventually, they became accustomed to seeing the Roman's outside of their village. They became complacent and lost their fear of the original threat eventually. T

he Romans knew this and when everyone was desensitized to their presence, they struck. It was as easy as stomping on a bug or destroying an ant hill at that point. They would take over the city and then would psychologically manipulate the people to the point that the victims would feel "grateful" and see the Romans in a positive light!

 They would feel appreciative of the high tech plumbing, running water, beautiful architecture, exotic foods.

Never realizing what they lost. They lost their home, lost their identity, and lost all of their personal freedoms.

Sound familiar? It should. Our entire westernized system of government, banking, and acquisition is based on the Roman empire's psychological tactics. Before Rome, it was called the Babylonian Money Magik system. First is the fear, then the choice, then the apathy, then the effortless take over of personal liberties, property, authenticity of the individual, the rich get richer, the poor work harder.

If you don't believe that, let me give you another example.

When an impoverished region of the world gets "aid" by wealthy nations, the first thing that changes in the region is their trade system. Currency is introduced instead of trade among neighboring villages. (which is what they did successfully for thousands of years)

Usually their own trading system has failed because the closest developed region no longer gives them essentials, medical care, or supply routes to do trade. A faction of "terrorists" are usually along these supply lines and eventually after many sad and horribly violent acts have taken place, the people decide it is best to starve than to be raped, imprisoned, or for their family units to be broken up by these guerrilla mafia type groups. These militia types are on a payroll. They have the best weapons, they come from the general area... So why are they raping and torturing and slaughtering innocent nomadic people for wanting food? What is it to them? Money? Well, they didn't have a monetary system for thousands of years, so they are willing to slaughter their own people over pieces of paper? You bet they are. And you can also bet that they are on the direct deposit of some "civilized" government that created them to break the spirit of the already broken people of the region. But don't worry... the savior is coming... and it's a piece of paper.

That neighboring "successful" region was once just like the impoverished one... and the same type of Romanized conquering method happened to them. So, the more progressive locals try to talk to the impoverished tribal people and say, "the best thing is to just let them come in and help you. You'll have hospitals, schools, clothing, And those militia guys will stop killing you and raping your wives."

Bear in mind that these tribal people never needed western medicine before the 'west' moved into the region and brought their diseases with them.  They weren't hungry until their land was pilfered and polluted by big industrial plants or mining operations. They had schools, but their schools were more spiritually based, lessons of the forefathers, survival, astronomy, charting the seasons, when to plant crops, how to heal the spirit, mind, and body... how to mother, how to make goods that provide for everyone in the village.  Now their schools include classes about the Founders of Government or Economy, or my favorite... American & British History. GIVE ME A BREAK.

Fast forward to a decade in the future... Huge industrial plants were built on their once sacred ground. Generations of people who once charted the stars and knew how to provide for their entire community are now in polluted industrial assembly lines, disconnected from nature, animals, and other-selves.

I use the term "other selves" because your neighbor, fellow humans, we are all connected. They are you, you are them, we are each other. We are individual as far as our gifts, personality, and distinct vibrational frequency that we project to the world... but if I hurt you, I hurt myself.
If I enslave you, I have enslaved myself. There's a pact between us all, a balance.

"Every action has an equal or opposite reaction." -Isaac Newton.

On a quantum level, all energy, matter, you, I, them... Everything has a force/action. So that being said, every Action must be met with an additional action of equal or opposite REACTION.
That means, to me, we are connected on an energetic level with every single thing in the universe. There is no action without reaction. Looks like that takes more than just 'self' to make the laws of energy and inertia applicable, right?

This is a scientific way of explaining the ancient eastern philosophies of Karma. It isn't that we are punished because something decided to react without our "act." It is because we acted that there is a Reaction. Push and pull. Light and Dark. Up and down.

What happens when action is directed to something that isn't acting? If I push you and you don't fall, you have either to react by pushing back, or by standing there and taking it. Either one of those options is still a reaction. There cannot be non-reaction.

Some may quote the biblical verse, "turn the other cheek." That was still a Reaction.

My point is coming... I promise. Stay strapped in, and we will reach the end of the ride, you have my word.

Everything happening in our world right now is a Reaction to something, right? We know that Reaction and Action are one in the same. Infinitely interweaving within each other.

It may seem like all of the chaos is just an unstoppable snake eating it's own tail. If we react to all of the problems, we cause another action, causing more problems that we react to... rinse and repeat ad infinitum.

In order to know how to jump out of the tornado, we have to see what all was swept up within it.  That tornado is a torsion field that is now spiraling out of control and gobbling up people, places, ideas,  joy, happiness, dignity, liberties... you name it, it's going to be swallowed up by that vortex of destruction, right?  What is fueling it? Why on earth isn't that tornado slowing down?


We have been conditioned, just like the athlete, or just like the frog in boiling water, to not realize we are building up layers of tolerance to things we shouldn't tolerate. Who is conditioning us? How? Is this just a bunch of conspiracy crap? No, sadly it's not.

What if you didn't watch or look at any mainstream media for one week. Just one. Imagine it. One week you didn't read the paper, didn't check Twitter, didn't log on to Facebook, didn't flip on CNN or Fox or your local news at 9pm.

Instead, you decided to meet everyone that lives on the street you live on, or the apartment complex you rent from. For one week, your information is just getting to know everyone that lives within a mile of you.
 First thing in the morning, you go outside and have a conversation with a couple of people who are also outside. Maybe they tell you about their grandchildren, or how they saw a shooting star the night before, or how a squirrel was pestering them all morning... or maybe they want nothing to do with you at all and flip you the bird and walk off.

 Whatever the case is, by the end of that week, there would be such a sense of realness, interdependence, love, support, understanding, compassion... Now, let's say that for the next following week, you were told that you couldn't speak to any of those people and you could only use your phone to check social media, CNN, Fox, read the paper, etc...

I can tell you this...
 It would be shocking to your system. You would feel like everything you experienced within that week of zero media was like a dream. "That's not the real world anyway. I can't believe that I was talking about stupid squirrels with my neighbor and terrorists were raiding another city and slaughtering everyone!" Were they? As far as you were concerned, the squirrel that was banging on your window with acorns was the terrorist that week.  How would you feel if your community was infiltrated by actual terrorists before you spent a week bonding with them? Second option is if you never knew any of them but "read about it" or "saw it on the news."

Very different outcomes of that cause and effect thing I was talking about a few paragraphs earlier.

The conditioning is the key element here. 

We are being conditioned, have been conditioned, to accept that there is nothing we can do, our feelings aren't valid, everything the media says is happening is actually happening.  They condition us to know who the bad guys are, who the good guys are, who the victims are, the why's, where, when and how, are all spelled out for us every day.

We haven't met our "neighbors" folks. We have no idea about why any of this is happening in our world because we are just told that it's "our problem now."

"What are we going to do about it!" "Our lives matter!" "See there, the cops are out of control!" "They are killing everyone for no damn reason." "This ISIS group is a bunch of muslims and Islam is bringing down the world!" "Trump is bad, Trump is good, Hilary is a crook, Hilary is a woman savior, the anti-Christ... "Another shooting, this time in...." "Innocent people were mowed down by a truck...." "Munich shooting kills 9, possible terrorist ties...."  

It goes on and on and on and on and on.... We react, they act, we react, they act, we act, they react.... Through this process we are conditioning ourselves to expect the worst. Each day brings "additional weight" to our conditioning program.  By the end of this conditioning, we will be apathetic, numb, and conditioned perfectly to expect horrible things, roll over and take it.  What's the use, right?

Wrong. We have to know what and who we are reacting to before it becomes a juggernaut and stops the momentum of all of these attacks on our collective consciousness. We do have power. We have all of the power.

"Rome" has built the camps around our consciousness.  All it is waiting for is for our renunciation, our apathy, our complacency. Then our consciousness will be sieged and we will not even remember why we fought so hard to keep "rome" out? They brought us solutions! They brought us a new way to live, a new way to think, they delivered us from this apathy and gave us amenities that we didn't have before... What are we lacking, we have Everything, right?

We will have nothing. We only have what they told us we have, what they brought with them, and we have lost our consciousness or birthright in the process to a manipulative few that have a template for how they condition the masses. We just reacted to it for so long that now,  we built up a tolerance to the pain, the lies, the social engineering. That's it. Show is over.

What can we do now?

We can be aware of this conditioning. We can dare ourselves to see beyond what is being said, or force fed as fact and power shoved down our throats. We can choose to not be sheep. Our shepherd is and has been a monster for a long time... But we've been steadily eating the poisoned grass as we edge closer and closer to the side of the cliff. That false "shepherd" or "system" doesn't care if we fall off the edge, die from poisoned grass. There are always more sheep, there are always new ways to poison those sheep. Those sheep do a lot of the heavy lifting. They "mow the back 40" for FREE? Yeah, I think I want to own some of those sheep.  The fine print is this... "

Warning: Please keep the sheep unaware of the true nature of the shepherd's monstrous appearance or they won't herd together and they will not follow you. Make sure to give them some delicious food every once in a while, but not very much. Just enough to make them think they earned it. If they want too much of the good stuff, start poisoning it. If they begin to wander off,  make an example out of the one that wandered off in front of the herd. If the herd lives too long, add more poison to their water supply. Keep the herd at a manageable size. They don't know what is best for them, but we, the monsters do. If you have a black sheep born into your herd, be very careful. The black sheep tend to be a bit more unruly than the white sheep. You may need to scare them more than the others. If a real shepherd stops by and suspects that you are mistreating your herd, just take his herd and ridicule his abilities to lead. Soon enough, all the shepherds will be our kind, and the herd won't even realize it."

I urge all of us to not react, not eat the poisoned grass, pay attention to where the razor's edge is, and for the love of Humanity, let's unmask the shepherd and face the REAL monster!  We must wake up folks. There is no separation. We've been told to be separate. We've been instructed ever so subtly who to hate. We don't even know what team we are playing on anymore! What is the game we are playing? What inning is it? We've been told that you must be this or that. Republican or Democrat. Rich or Poor. Smart and Stupid. Crazy or Sane. Christian or Muslim. Gay or Straight. Male and Female. And with each option, there are sub options that go along with those things... not because they actually do apply to those descriptions, but because we've been conditioned to believe certain things and reject any type of open ended idea or inquiry.

"What box do you want to fit in? Here are your options... there are only the options we provide for you. If you don't check the box, you can't be here. Only the people who check the options we've provided are allowed here. Everyone else  can wait in the other area and we will be in shortly to condition you some more. "  

"Resistance is futile." -The Borg, Star Trek. "All will be assimilated." 

We must raise our awareness of this type of conditioning. We are being brainwashed and poisoned a little bit at a time, each day, to ready all of our consciousness for some Major change/takeover. That is what is happening. History repeats itself until it doesn't!

We must start asking questions about what is truth, what is disinformation, what is distracting us from something we all need to be asking questions about and holding people accountable for. We must proudly display our "tin foil hats" and march into the face of all that we are being fed right now about who the terrorists are, why they are doing what they are, who is to blame, why guns are killing cops, why black people are being targeted, why transgendered bathroom drama is getting top billing...
Why why why are we having to power dunked by the media into tubs of  pain, tragedy, injustice, racial inequality, religious wars... Why are we being told EXACTLY who the "bad guys are," instead of why it's happening and why it isn't stopping? It's getting stupid.

"Clean your plate, or you don't get any dessert."  Oh, I guess I better eat all that was given to me whether or not I even like it because I really want the pleasure of that pay off brownie sundae later.
The sundae never comes. The sundae was a lie. But before you get that sundae, you have to eat another plate, then another, then another...then you are violently puking up your force fed dinners and that is when the dessert tray comes rolling out. "Oh you don't want dessert now? I thought you wanted dessert? Well, this is the last time you are going to see this dessert tray for a while so are you absolutely sure you don't want it?"

We end up refusing what originally would have made us happy because we were forcibly eating things that did not make us happy for so long that we are now sick. Very sick.

Let's get our heads out of the sand. Let's start asking the tough questions. Let's flip up the couch and see what kind of nasty roaches are living under there. It's going to suck, but we have to do this or we will be overrun by vermin.

We are all One. We are in this together. We must start acting like it. Love each other. Love your neighbor. Love the weirdo down the street. What can it possibly hurt just to think loving thoughts about others? What can it strip from you to think that we are all more connected than we are separate? This is actually our super hero power, our Divine right...

Quantum Entanglement is our secret Avenger's weapon against all of this horror, fear and hatred. That weapon can also destroy us. That is what it is doing now.  If we are all focused or "entangled" in the conditioning of fear and separation, we will play right into the trap.

We must entangle our consciousness with love and wisdom. We must want to wish love to those who we have been conditioned to think are different or separate from us. They aren't. They ARE us. We Are them. It is scientifically impossible for us to not be connected to each other on an energetic level!

So why are we being brow beaten into thinking that we aren't connected, that we Are different, that you are this and I am that...?

Maybe, just maybe, the "roman army" that is waiting to siege our consciousness, our freedom, our identity, our humanity... Maybe they have the same knowledge of how Quantum Entanglement works too.  It works both ways. Remember that.

We must begin thinking of Loving each other.  Listen to me, we can do this. We must do this. We can and will win this time if we all join together and accept each other as ourselves. It's not unrealistic. Just start by smiling at someone you don't know. Saying hello to the gas station attendant and wishing him/her a happy day. That annoying person that drives you crazy? Try laughing instead of fuming. After all, it is hilarious how worked up we can get over someone who smacks their food or has a stupid look on their face. Just laugh about it. Release it. Begin small. One kind act leads to a reaction.  Let's start a domino effect of healing action. Let's redirect our normal Reactions to actions that are not passive, not violent, but entirely opposite from what we typically do.  It's up to us to lead ourselves. It's up to us to help each other. It's up to us to love one another and forgive ourselves and others.

Thanks for reading this.

Thursday, July 7, 2016

The Dream That Changed Everything

The Dream That Changed Everything

by Melodee Lenz 

Back in 2005- The Los Angeles Years 

I was living in Los Angeles. The year prior to that, I was living in New York. Quite the contrast of, "vibes," going from one place to the other. I was miserable in Los Angeles. I was living next door to Paramount Studios in a 400' sqf apartment with ZERO amenities. Seriously, there was no stove, fridge, microwave, and there was a giant hole in the ceiling above the toilet. You could actually see clouds through that hole. The apartment had a giant billboard outside of my bedroom window that said, "Ramses." My sense of humor had created many deep philosophical jokes about that. I was living under the sign of Ramses in a very metaphorical way, i.e. a slave in the empire of vanity. 

 I was in a very strained relationship at the time, with someone who was taking advantage of my good nature at every turn he could. He had for years, and I kept forgiving and trying to be of help to him.  He was a tortured soul, broken, and had addiction history that could've been worthy of one of those horrible reality shows on TLC. I had never done drugs, didn't like alcohol, and pretty much assumed all of the insanity that I had experienced in my life was 100% due to being gullible and/or an idiot. 

Life had come to the metaphorical, "boiling point," and I knew I was either going to be cooked, or I was going to have to jump out of the pot before certain death occurred. I felt like my life had been nothing but unusually painful events, triumphs,  and a rinse & repeat of both of those things.

 Most of the unusual aspects of my life involved things I couldn't talk about with anyone without fear of being carried away in a white padded "Crazy Bus." From the moment I could walk and talk, I had been tormented by paranormal entities. I'm not strictly speaking of ghosts either. I'm talking about things that were never, "us." Massively tall horrifying creatures with spindly teeth, black cloaks, red slit-pupil eyes, and enormous claws, wings, and the ability to permeate my mind, dreams, and effect every person in my life by making them angry. The other horrible side-effect of this nasty entity was how it wore me down physically as a child. I was sick constantly. I vomited weekly, I had reoccurring infections of my lungs, throat, ears, and routinely had bouts of anemia. The sicker I got, the more it attacked me. However, somehow I remained alive, and I could mentally/spiritually fight it off. 

I got better with age at fighting this thing. My will power was unreal. I could persevere through anything, and did. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by writing about the less-than noble actions of certain family members, but let's just say that I had torment coming from all angles, all-the-time.  

On a positive note, I had just as many powerful moments on the good side of things too.  I was a great entertainer, had many talents, had many friends and an incredible sense of humor. I also knew how to forgive, let go, and forget about the bad stuff. 

Although these traits of altruism and forgiveness are coveted by most, they are also the reason I stayed in horrible friendships and relationships... They were also caustic of how I managed to go against the grain and live in Los Angeles against my better judgement. 

I hated LA. HATED IT.  Most people I encountered exhibited the worst aspects of humanity and seemed proud to be wearing their flaws on the outside of their clothing. They were vain, self-centered, ruthless, competitive, and artificial to the core. 

Of course I met some good people too, but I can count them on one hand. 

In everything I did, I always feared something lurking around that could show up at any time to torment me. Meaning- the horrific entity and his counterparts that seemed to follow me everywhere I moved... and ghosts... lots of ghosts. If a place was known to be haunted, I would accidentally move into that very place. I kept quiet about these things because I knew that nobody would believe me. Remember, this was 2005... I know that isn't a long time ago,  but people were not as accepting of the paranormal back then. There were exceptions of a few ghost hunting shows that had newly launched on the Syfy network, but they were still in the experimental phase of programming.   

The relationship I was in at the time was getting worse. It was always bad, but unknown to me, I was waking up and realizing I could reclaim my sense of self. Anytime the oppressed becomes aware of their oppressors, a revolution begins.  I looked forward to the weeks when he was gone, working gigs outside of the country.  

My best friend at the time was living in San Francisco. She had recently moved there and she was having bad luck left and right, as was I. I would call her and we would joke around about "ending it all" with baby aspirins. We would laugh at this mental imagery of chewing up huge portions of cherry flavored Bayer Children's aspirin and how it would take a lot of effort to kill oneself in this way... so at least you'd feel like you deserved the death because, you know,  it was "hard work."  If that sounds dark, it probably was, but we have that type of humor with each other. No red flags were raised and no "help lines" were called. We knew we were just joking around and trying to add some type of levity to the miserable conditions of our lives at the time. 

I was working at a shop that provided a great deal of wardrobe for various production studios around LA. This job was my "day job," but it was the only job paying consistent money and it didn't suck all that hard. It sucked though. I would run into celebrities daily, some were cool, most were not. The worst one I ran into was Katherine Heigl (sp?). She was a horrible person. So was Patricia Heaton.  Both of these ladies were horribly rude and predatory in their desire to make everyone feel like total sh*t.  Of course, they were probably full of self doubt and pain, and hey... so was I! 
I digress... a lot... sorry. 

I'm painting a picture of how horrible life was, but trust me, it was way worse than anything I've been able to hammer out in this blog. If I listed all the "bad luck" scenarios of 2004-2005, I would have to set aside an entire year to write it all down. Unbelievably horrible stuff went down in those years, but I kept going, kept my head above water, and trudged onward. 

God Screams At Me, "WAKE UP!

Before the subject of this blog, "the dream that changed everything," I had several events that happened that can't even be described as synchronistic. That word, in all of its infinite meaning, doesn't come close to describing the glaringly obvious miracles happening right in front of me. 

I had miracles my whole life, but I would think, "this must happen to everyone, I'm not special." That may be true, is true, but what IS special is how the synchronistic miracles were tailor made from my S.O.S. calls to the divine realms. I was getting more than clues, more than questions answered, I was being knocked in the face by miracle situations and I was still not "getting it."  

Example: An earthquake in the middle of the night rendered my toilet(the one with the hole in the ceiling to the outside) broken. It wouldn't flush, it wouldn't stop running, it was just going to become a "situation" if I didn't get a new pipe and rubber ring to go around the broken line. I went down Melrose to a 24 hour grocery store in the bad part of town. It was the only place I knew would have hardware for broken plumbing. #poorpeopleproblems 

Before I had gone to bed that night, I was asking the universe/God/Angels if my life meant anything, was I kidding myself with trying to be something bigger than what I was, "give me a sign," to let me know if I'm on the right path.  

So... fast forward several hours to the toilet exploding water... 

I'm driving to the ghetto grocery store in LA for plumbing supplies. I go into the store, which is full of drunks, crack heads, and about 2 cashiers who looked like they hadn't slept in 4 months. I'm standing in line and I notice this woman in front of me. She looks familiar. She looks like an overweight version of this girl in elementary school who tormented me daily. She was the popular girl in school, she was mean, and she was responsible for most of my elementary school days being known as "Shamu the Whale." She pushed cripple kids down the stairs, she destroyed my VIP Day presentation of my accomplishments(4th grade), and she would tell the teachers HUGE lies about me and put on fake tears... I'd get into trouble and I had done nothing wrong. She even faked a hand injury once and told everyone that "Melodee Lenz, Shamu, she stepped on my hand and she's so fat that she broke it." 

Yeah, that kind of person. She was EXACTLY the same in middle school too. She was one of three reasons I transferred out of that school and never looked back.  So... moving along with my story now... I was full of self-loathing. I thought that I wasn't perfect enough, thin enough(even though I worked out every single day and was a Raw Food Vegan) and and and.... Lots of self-esteem issues at the time. I had perfectionism issues. I put myself through regimens that would've had Navy Seals recruiting me if they only knew my "daily's" or mind-over-matter techniques. If I had a thought of, "I don't want to..." I would replace it with, "Well, now you are going to, and you are going to do it better than you did before." It was insanity.

 If I broke my diet, I would unleash such hell on myself for breaking an oath that I had made to myself. I took EVERYTHING very seriously and I lived my own private hell. To me, discipline and will power were more important than any other form of human experience. If I could make myself flawless, I'd could overcome anything. I had a saying, "Nobody can push me as hard as I push myself." I had learning problems in school, slow to read, slow to write, and slow to understand the English language in general. As a young adult, I was damn near a scholar and 100% self-taught. I read everything I could get my hands on, except fiction. Zero fiction allowed. I read science books, self-help books, ancient philosophy, ancient everything, physics books, medical journals, Eastern medicine text books, memorized everything... My point? I was REALLY  hard on myself. I think it was because I never wanted to feel vulnerable, stupid, fat, or helpless ever again if I could prevent it. 

Now... back to the... 

Grocery store check out line... Okay so this chick looks familiar... She looks like the worst kid I've ever known from my childhood school days, only this chick is extremely overweight and looks pretty worn out to just be 25 years old? Her credit card was declined. She started crying. She was clearly in a  bad situation and it seemed like she was 100% alone, broke, and desperate. 

I said, "I got this." I paid for her stuff... 

That's when I looked down and saw her driver's license and then saw her name... Courtney(leaving out the last name).... (words cannot describe how I felt at this moment... I was actually on the verge of passing out)  

She turned to me and said, "thank you. I'm Courtney. Thank you so much. I got trashed in Vegas and got married to this a**hole and he stole all my money and I'm just trying to get by until my brother wires me money and I can get home."  

I had the impression that she had told this story to many people that day and nobody believed her. Everyone in LA addicted to drugs tell similar stories. I mean to say that her story wasn't unusual to the jaded LA crowd. 

I said, "No problem Courtney. Happy to help." 

We walked out and she said, "I'm sorry, what was your name, I'm sorry if I didn't remember it, you probably told me but..." 

(she didn't ask me my name until that moment) 

As I walked to my car I said, "Shamu." 

She looked at me kind of confused, and said, "What was it?" I said, "Melodee Lenz. You can call me Shamu though. Be careful Courtney. I wouldn't tell your sob story to anyone around here, they won't be as accepting. Trust me, I know better than anyone how that feels."  She looked at me in a way I've never seen anyone look at me... 

It was as though her whole life crumbled... because it had to, but I had to be the one that shattered it. She had the same effect on me as well.  

Now, I ask you, look at the events that happened that led up to this moment of seeing your childhood arch enemy in a crack infested grocery store in the middle of Hollywood, middle of the night, all due to a mild earthquake that broke a line in the toilet which forced me to get out of bed and remedy the situation....  

Keep in mind that we went to a private school that was in rural Texas. The kind of school that doesn't lend itself to graduates leaving the zip code, let alone the state. To date, she is the only person I've ever run into from that school. And I run into her in the middle of the night in a bad neighborhood in LA? Miracle.  The  message I received was God SCREAMING at me... "LOOK, I'm here! Melodee! WAKE UP! You want proof of your life being worth something... here you go!" 

Well... Sadly, that wasn't enough for my gullible/easily influenced brain. My boyfriend at the time, was more like a narcissistic prison guard addicted to drugs; than he was a loving compassionate human being... 
I told him the story, expecting him to be just as blown away by it. He had no reaction and then turned the whole thing around on me with a lethal combo of shame n' blame, "why were you at that horrible place that late at night. You could've been killed. You should never go there again. Do  you hear me! Do you hear me? Of course you had some crazy thing happen because you vibed in that bullsh*t. "

The Awakening

I'll proceed to the meat of this entry now...

After the realization of synchronistic events taking place left and right in my miserable life back in LA, I began a ruthless internal quest for answers of how, why, and when I could "get out" of the existence I was living. I had many close friends that I would secretly confide in about how much I hated where I was living and how depressed I was. One friend in particular had just moved to San Francisco from Texas. She was just as miserable as I was, but we had a unique way of coping with our conjoined misery. We used comedic scenarios to make each other laugh about how badly our lives sucked at the time. We would say, "Today, it's baby aspirin time." We thought it was hilarious to joke about suicide by "baby aspirin." No, we weren't crazy, just comedians. Those little jabs about taking baby aspirin and throwing ourselves into a bottomless pit, became my daily dose of lighthearted fun in the midst of very real darkness. 

Okay here goes nothin'... 

One day I was scheduled to work at my least favorite job off of Larchmont Avenue in Los Angeles. I worked part-time for a store that furnished a great deal of wardrobe for various film productions in and around LA. Most of the people who worked at this place were certifiably crazy. They made me feel even more alone because I couldn't connect no matter how hard I tried. My schedule that day began at 2pm. I was going to work until close that day.  I was feeling extremely tired and thought it might be good to take a nap. My psycho boyfriend was out of town on a gig somewhere in Canada or China(can't remember where) and I had the place to myself. No fights. No crazy making conversations, no manipulation. Free!  Oftentimes I would contemplate how I could leave him but the good natured part of me wouldn't allow myself to just abandon someone who 'had problems.' 
Regardless, I was happy he was out of town and I could just relax. 

I decided to take a nap. It was around 11:30am. I had no real furniture, so I made a pallet on the floor and just fell asleep, fast. 

Most of my life, I can remember falling asleep and spinning in a vortex, round and round, like a wormhole, a kaleidoscope of colors and images would be spinning in the vortex with me. This feeling I knew very well and I dreaded it. I've always been a lucid dreamer, able to control myself within a dream, and pull myself out of a dream when necessary.  Typically, in these "vortex" parts of my dream, I would consciously say to myself, "oh no, not this again..."  I had gone quite a few years without this vortex sensation. This harmless nap I was taking was far from being just an ordinary nap. I started going into the vortex within seconds of falling asleep. I saw my body laying there on the floor, I was suspended above it in almost an etheric unseen realm. I decided to let go and just travel to wherever it was I was headed through this vortex sensation. 

I came out on the other side and I was greeted by the warmest group of people I've ever known. I was slightly confused, which they found mildly amusing, and it was as though they were "rolling out the red carpet" for my arrival there. The feeling I had was as though I knew all of them in some fashion but they weren't on my plane of existence. There was one male in particular who gave off a vibe of being "the one in charge." I felt particularly close to him. It was a feeling that I imagine war veterans feel when they run into an old comrade that they fought beside in a perilous battle. That feeling of knowing someone on such a deep level that no words can be said that would encompass such closeness.  He said, "Welcome back. You have been missed, but before all of that, let's get you caught up. I'm sure you are confused. It's natural to be. You've had one of the hardest journeys, but before we get into all of that, why don't we go back here and get you a little less confused."  All of this seemed to be telepathically communicated with feelings, not so much dialog. I went into an area with a large chair and a type of viewing screen/window. I could see out and I could see the expanse of the galaxy. It was so beautiful, it was home. 

Before I was debriefed, I had to look out of this window to what was being called, "the sea of souls." It was where all of the energy/soul matrix' of every individual waiting to be placed into a body was being held. It looked like a vast ocean of the top crest of a wave, interloping and weaving in and out of one another in a blue etheric plane. It was stunningly beautiful. I looked out and remembered how much I loved all of them. They were pure energy and light. They had been cleansed of any distortions or sins or flaws. They were all One yet they were individual making up a collective sea of pure light energy.  A female that I knew very well approached me. She was kind of a part of me, but I never knew her in waking life. She had to say goodbye to me and gave me this hug of sorts... it was more like an energetic joining and then separation. She told me that she had "to go there," looking out at the sea of souls, but assured me that I would no longer need her assistance, not to worry, etc... In a nutshell, she was headed out to be placed in service to the One Creator, but she was proud of how strong I was and assured me that I would be fine from now on. It felt like she was kind of a twin soul of some sort. When she embraced me, we looked like a yin/yang of energy, a puzzle that fit together beautifully.  I was sad to see her go, but I knew it was her duty somehow? 

I proceed to the room/viewing window. I sit down in this large chair that was somehow hooked up to the energy of whomever sat in it. It could read your unique signature of your being's energy and run a "program" of the history of information that would trigger the "remembering" of who you were, why you were on earth, and a type of download of the entire history of creation itself and how you were integrated and perfectly placed to be of assistance to "your assignment." 

I'm finding this story hard to write... forgive my errors in explaining things correctly. Most of this information is beyond words and the majority of it I'm not allowed to remember. (I'll get to that) 

This "download" of EVERYTHING, all the history of life itself, was almost instantaneously delivered with images, sensations, sounds, feelings, and and and...  It all culminated to the "playback" of when I decided to take on a mission on Earth.  There was a board room type area with several people, including me, looking at a schematic of Earth and all of the strategic entry points, scenarios, and cause/effect outcomes. We had a BIG mission. It felt like it was a collaborative effort between our group and several other factions who were trying to restore balance to Earth. The planning of placing certain souls in certain areas was of the upmost importance. It had to be planned out perfectly and there were various routes any one soul could take that would reach maximum effectiveness. The plans were of a Divine request. Each group participating in this secret war between good and evil had to volunteer, give free will consent to take on such a huge responsibility. 

The feeling I had while being given this information of "remembering my origin" was that of a huge undertaking of many different factions and groups operating in a Divine directive to help humanity overcome the dark forces that were present on Earth.  Imagine any war movie taking place in the planning phase and you will understand the feeling. It was a serious operation and it could go very wrong. For one, the persons who were volunteering for the missions had to be "mind erased" so that they would not artificially "do their job." They had to forget their mission/who they really were so that it would be in alignment with the One Creator/Divine will of free will. Otherwise, we would be no better than the dark forces that were 100% aware of their horrible plans to corrupt humanity and feed off of their fear and pain. Literally, humanities fear, pain, sadness, was a sort of "food" for the dark forces that had completely distorted all nations on Earth. 

The particular group I was a part of seemed to be in charge of other groups that were doing the same type of volunteer missions. I was an officer of some sort. A high ranking/yet rank didn't matter, or overseer of this kind of weigh station area for souls.  There was one assignment on this "board room table" that seemed really urgent and it could be split up into several assignments for several volunteers, but whomever was going to do it needed to act fast because the next wave of "the mission" had to be "sent to Earth" during this particular window of time. We were all gathered around and looking at the possibilities of volunteers, but none of the options seemed like a win-win. Certain hallmarks had to be met, certain people had to be introduced to other people, and the dark forces were going to be highly aware of that particular assignment due to the persons who were already in the family structures.  It was like a 1-1000000000000000000000 chance of everything working out without being ruined or distorted by hundreds of variables.   

Time was ticking and I apparently said, "I'll do it." And the man I mentioned earlier spoke up and said, "What do you mean? No, we have plenty of new volunteers who we could send, we just need to sort it out." That is when I said, "we don't have time to sort it out and get them trained to know what to do, and besides, there's no guarantee that it would do any good anyway the way we have this mission split up into 4 different assignments! What if it was just all lumped into one assignment. It could be done. It would be almost impossible but it could be done. We could put certain signs encoded that I would remember and enhance the distortion toward curiosity, or mathematical patterns..." The man interrupted me and said, "no, it's impossible to connect all of these lines together. How are you going to do that? That is when we realized that one of the mother figures needed a catalyst moment because she was lost and kind of karmically caught up in a bad cycle. We knew that she was most likely inclined to give a baby up for adoption during this time period due to her self-loathing and inability to see a way out of her situation. The other family group would be guided by a member of our group who was already incarnate at the time. She will suggest adoption to her daughter and this will re-trigger her/her line's love energy and heal the partner she chose. The rest of the story is risky at best."  I was trained and I was strong but I had to lose all knowledge of that before coming to Earth. I would have subtle hints and signs that would trigger the "knowing" of the assignment, but it was going to be a crap shoot. However, if it worked, if I was successful, then it would be one of many assignments that could tip the scales in the favor of  Good. 

It was like a "butterfly effect" module but strategically mapped out with endless possible outcomes. 

After I was given all the information about how I "got into this mess," I felt so in awe. I was so full of love and light and a feeling of euphoria over how much we are all loved by the One Creator. It blew my mind how much effort was being directed at such fragile creatures like animals, humans, the air we breathe, water, etc... The effort was unparalleled in it's dedication to be of service to Earth because of it being a Divine order.  The Earth was an anomalous situation, one that wasn't the standard for all intelligent life in the universe. Earth had been corrupted from day one, and the primary law of Free Will had been hijacked by forces who claimed to be creators, but were posers.  The Earth is the number one concern in the entire universe. The success of Earth is a team effort on the part of countless intelligent loving beings, angelic beings, and millions of volunteers who have decided to come into human form, forget their origins, and restore wisdom, balance, and bring love & light.  

After I was given all of this information, the origin of everything, including myself, I was asked if I wanted to stay or go back. I said, "what? Is it over or?" I was told that I had "done enough, more than what was expected, and that was the arrangement we made." In my mind, I felt like I had just begun living?  I said, "well, I enjoy the performing stuff there. That's been fun. I have a real talent for singing and dance.(we laughed) I mean, I'm sure I could do a lot more?" They said, "Sure you can. But it's all up to you. You completed the tasks we assigned and even more than what we thought was possible. You can come back here, or you can stay and enjoy the rest of your time there,  help out the cause, but if you go back to Earth, you cannot take the information with you. You can take some of it, but not the details. That's the way this works, remember? (we laughed)"  I thought about it and thought about how upset everyone would be on Earth, but I ultimately made the decision to come back to Earth because I wanted to enjoy living, have some adventures, etc.. 

As I left this plane of wherever I was, I tried to hold on to the information I gained in the "download chair," but a very kind voice said, "You can't take it back with you, you must let it go if you want to return." I realized my transition back to Earth/back to my body was being disrupted somewhat  by my "hanging on" to information.  You may be asking how I know as much as I do? Or how I kept/retained as much as I did? I was allowed to remember what I've written in this blog. I was not allowed to remember where I was, names, or the details on every aspect of divine creation or the hierarchy of the various realms of the heavenly beings/their role in Earth events, etc... 

I woke up back in my body and looked at the clock. I thought I was late for work, and began rushing around getting dressed and grabbing my bag, keys, and other necessities to leave. I looked at my cell phone and I had close to 48 missed calls. I thought that this had to be a mistake. There was no way 48 phone calls came into my phone during a 2 hour nap, right?  I listed to several voice messages and they were all from my employer wondering where I was, why I wasn't picking up the phone,  was I coming in later, was I okay?  My Mom called me and said that my job had called her asking if she knew where I was, that I hadn't reported to work or contacted them.  

I looked at the date on my phone and I couldn't believe it. I was missing time. My 2 hour nap was more like 2 days!  What happened? Where was I? The panic set in and I had to figure out how to explain myself. That is when something profound happened to me. I took a breath, thought for a split second about the panic I was in, then remembered the dream. I remembered the point of the experience. I remembered that I said "I want to go back to Earth to enjoy myself for once. To live my dream, see what happens, have an adventure..."   I decided to leave LA. I quit my job that I hated. I received a phone call from a friend asking me if I wanted to run a business with him back in Texas, do a show that I enjoyed doing each year for the State Fair of Texas.... I dumped my horrible boyfriend that had kept me in an emotional lockdown for many years. I dropped 40 pounds of excess weight that I have never gained back. I had crazy physical transformations happening left and right. My teeth magically were not gapped in the middle, my orthodontic bite problem was fixed, my face looked different, I grew 2 full inches taller and I felt like I was awake for the first time ever. The best part of the transformation was that I no longer had to battle terrible paranormal experiences every night. I had been plagued my entire life at night by various dark horribly demonic entities. No, seriously, I'm not joking... it was "a thing" that I dealt with most of my life. After this wonderful journey to the place before "my place here," I never dealt with the dark nightmarish entities again. 

My entire experience of living changed. I was able to have fun, enjoy movies, I felt smarter, in control, free to express myself fully. The trees looked greener! 

Our existence is magical. We are surrounded by millions of volunteers who came here because they won't give up on this human experience or the planet itself. The main thing I learned with this journey is that nothing is an accident, we are all divinely connected, we are all part of the Sea of Souls, we are all manifestations of One ocean of energy that expresses itself in countless infinite ways through YOU. You are me. I am you. We are One. One is all. 

There is no death. There is no punishment that is forever. It isn't black and white. It is only the endless experience through the infinite expression of the All. You are the gift. You bring with you the only thing you need in this experience here....yourself. By giving what you are, nothing more, nothing less, you have completed your assignment, you have brought balance where there was imbalance, and you have and will continue to do so through giving the gift of the expression that is You. We are all connected to each other endlessly and infinitely. I've seen it, I know it's true. 

Anything that separates you from knowing you are loved and knowing you are One, a part of the All, is a distorted imbalance. I write this blog today, disclosing this story about my experience, for one reason only. The "mission" is to bring the truth of how we are all One. Anything that separates you from that knowing is to be rejected, discarded and put in the recycle bin. There is no racism, there is no poor, rich, famous, homeless, stupid, smart, Christian, Muslim, Jew, Gentile....THAT is the distortion, the imbalance. We are all you, we are all me, we are all each other because we are all part of the All. Imagine 5 minutes of everyone treating each other as though the "other selves" were an extension of "self."  Golden Rule? Yes. Perhaps we've heard it too much and so it becomes sounds and words that are too familiar to our ears? I don't know, but I know that what I experienced was meant for everyone to know.  I wasn't special. I had arranged for that "wake up call" before I came here.  Maybe you have arranged for similar alarms for your own awakening?  

I hope you enjoyed the story. I hope that it reaches inside you and pulls out some truth that you needed at the moment you read it.  We must let ourselves love our 'other selves' and we must see similarities in each other instead of differences. Our experiences are all part of the canvas to a beautiful work of painting that we cannot see from where we stand right now. Keep painting. I'm sure once you see the whole picture, it will take your breath away.